Mr Harrington

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Re: Mr Harrington

Post by Bertje » Mon Jul 19, 2021 11:20 am

Bernard received his invoice.
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Re: Mr Harrington

Post by bware419ers » Mon Jul 19, 2021 12:17 pm

Irene received one, too, along with a bank account from Union Bank (reported).
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Re: Mr Harrington

Post by GrassEater » Mon Jul 19, 2021 9:21 pm

Brad has likewise received an invoice, although the math doesn't really add up. He received a bank account which has been reported, but it's for the same bank that bware mentioned.

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Re: Mr Harrington

Post by Bertje » Mon Jul 19, 2021 9:23 pm

those late fees get you all the time. (Mine were not calculated properly it seems)

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Re: Mr Harrington

Post by bware419ers » Tue Jul 20, 2021 1:44 pm

Silly lad.

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After that, the lad will be required to convert GBP to USD (and I'm going to want a good exchange rate).
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Re: Mr Harrington

Post by Bertje » Wed Jul 21, 2021 12:53 pm

Dear mr. Harrington,

After having spoken to my finance guy, mr. Shyloom, I can confirm that we will be paying the amount due.

I sincerely apologise for the immense delay in the payment. As stated before, I was not aware of any outstanding amount, or I would have attended to it much sooner.

As it seems that our company has not made any payment to your company before, according to the GDPR, we will be required to use a Security Intermediary to verify the transaction. I trust you don't have any issues with that.

Kind regards,

Bernard Happyclimate
Dear Bernard

This is a standard procedure. We already sent to you invoice for this bill.
Please, kindly make payment into the account that was provided to you. After which we’ll work on your records with us.
You should send receipt to this email after payment is made.

Regards,

Sincerely,
Of course, he wasn't speaking of the security intermediary when stating 'standard procedure', but....

Dear mr. Harrington,

Yes, the Security Intermediary is standard procedure. I am glad that you are familiar with it. I will arrange for the processing of the payment right away.

kind regards


The lad gets a notification from *Sexy Pic* that a transaction is waiting.
Dear Bernard ,

The account that was provided to you is for our cashing agent.
Your contact already sent to us an email that you’re about to send the payment.
We do not understand why this process is needed to make the payment.
Why do we have to go through this process to receive a payment?
We have never had such means of payment from any of our customer/clients.
So i must tell you that this is strange to us.
Dear mr. Harrington,

Thank you for your email.

I don't know why this is strange to you. I mentioned the intermediary in an earlier email, and you indicated your familiarity with this procedure, stating it was "standard procedure"! Certainly, your company must be familiar with the GDPR and it's associated legislation and jurisprudence? In accordance with our due diligence obligations, we are required to ask for a verification for this transaction.

We are using *Sexy Pic* because they use a state of the art linguistic and biometric procedure, which guarantees the highest level of security. Frankly, the fact you are unfamiliar with even the most basic of due diligence issues and the need for transactional verification has me very concerned.

Kind regards,

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Re: Mr Harrington

Post by bware419ers » Wed Jul 21, 2021 1:14 pm

We're sorry for this mishap…
This will be corrected soonest !!!

Invoice has been correctly attached to this email.
Thank you for your understanding…

Image
It doesn't appear to be completely correct. I am not in the UK.
We have corrected the address that was mistaken on the previous invoice that was sent to you.
What else is not correct now ?
Proving the old adage, "Lads are Lazy."
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Re: Mr Harrington

Post by paulc » Wed Jul 21, 2021 10:11 pm

Even though the outstanding debt collections are progressing well, Ken is still chasing Ebenezer about the missing money transfer
Please, i will like for you to visit your bank.
This transfer has gone beyond waiting for !!!
You should visit the bank to know what is actually happening to this transfer.
Don’t just call on phone, you have to visit the bank to know the real deal.
This is absolutely ridiculous !!!
The transfer is almost a month now.
What kind of transfer is it ???

Ebenezer responds
I've already told you the bank will take no action until the trace finishes on Friday.
They have said if the trace does not locate the money, the funds will be returned to my account.

In preparation for the money being returned to the church's account, Ebenezer passes some sad news the Ken
Did you hear about Dougal at the church? Apparently he got drunk on communion wine and ran naked around the church gardens. I'm told he's been moved to another church up in Scotland.

This paves the way for a new character to be introduced, Father Jack
Yes it is sad about Dougal. He was a nice young chap. His replacement is a guy called Jack Onory, I know him from other churches he's been at. We don't get on, he's a real pain in the ass with anger issues.

Obviously before Jack will release the returned funds, Ken will need to explain the whole story from the beginning again.

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Re: Mr Harrington

Post by Bertje » Thu Jul 22, 2021 5:58 am

Sexy pic received an upload. It appears to be the woman in the driver's license posted before, which we assume is an ITP. (So I'm not posting the picture here). (Thanks for the assistance Bware!)

The picture is being processed by the algorithms, and will not be accepted as ID.

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Re: Mr Harrington

Post by paulc » Thu Jul 22, 2021 11:05 am

Ken is confident ......
Okay… Lets wait till the tracer comes back.
Bernard and Irene are responding to me. I think they will pay.

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Re: Mr Harrington

Post by bware419ers » Thu Jul 22, 2021 1:48 pm


Please, check the attached file for updated invoice…
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That is too much. Return it to the proper amount in US Dollars.
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Re: Mr Harrington

Post by paulc » Sat Jul 24, 2021 10:45 pm

Update from Ken
The transfer from Bernard has been suspended. I don't know why they did that or what happened. But i got a message just now from the Sexy-Pic that the transfer has been suspended.
Also, i told you in my previous email that Bernard transfer was cancelled. I don’t know why they did that. But i sent you an attached picture for you to see it. So you can be sure…

Irene has not said anything yet since the last update i told you.

Brad ask today what the debt is about, and i have told him. And also explained the actually total debt, because there was an error on the invoice previously sent to him.

You can call them each to ask about the settlement of the debt. So you’ll know what to say to convince them more. They just need a little convincing!
Please work on them each !!!
Meanwhile Ebenezer informs Ken the trace has been unsuccessful
Coutts contacted me earlier. The trace was unable to locate the funds.
I have asked them to transfer the money straight to the church account.
Before they can do this they need confirmation from the receiver that
1. they haven't received the money and
2. if the money does get transferred to their account in the next 3 months, they will return it to Coutts
This needs to handwitten and signed
If you can arrange this I will pass it onto them and we can get this finally sorted.
Ken isn't happy
you did not have the right to tell them to transfer the money back to the church. I thought our agreement was that, if the tracer is not found, the money will be returned to your account.
That is what you should do now. Called them to inform them that the money is to be returned to your account.
When the money gets to your account, i will tell you how to resend it to us.
Why would you tell them to return it to the church ?
The church already put you incharge to handle how the money will get to us. So you did not need to return it to the church. The money should be return to you. Then i will tell you how the money will get to us.
But that would be far too easy so Ebenezer explains
I was worried if I sent it again to you it would get lost again and its the church's money not mine. Remember they are still my employer so I need to be careful. Bartholomew the Archdeacon said I should return it to the church and they will send it onto you.
So Ken has to contact the church
Dear father Jack Onory,

You should know that the transfer for the debt done by Ebenezer Shypock has not got to us. We didn’t receive the funds yet, since it was sent on June 25th.
I have never seen anything like that in my life. An international transfer should only take 3-5 working days.
So, he told me the Archdeacon has asked the funds to be returned to the church. I agreed with him to do that, for it to be resent.

Bless you, father Jack Onory
Unfortunately for Ken, he first needs to provide handwritten confirmation to Coutts before they will release the money, and by the time he does this the Archdeacon will have traveled to Africa for a conference on missionary work and can't be contacted. I guess he will just have to explain the whole story to Father Jack.

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Re: Mr Harrington

Post by Bertje » Sun Jul 25, 2021 7:16 am

Bernard is away for the weekend an will not be able to respond.

What happened is that the Sexy Pic servers found a "hit" in Interpol's database for the person in the picture. They have suspended the Transaction. The lad will have to find another person to do the picture (preferably himself). He'll get notified of this tomorrow.

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Re: Mr Harrington

Post by paulc » Sat Jul 31, 2021 3:13 pm

While our three clients are still deciding whether to pay or not, the lost money still hasn't been found by Coutts

Ebenezer to Ken
Coutts will keep looking for another 3 months before they write the money off, but have said they believe it is lost.
They will refund the money back to the church as soon as I send them the receivers confirmation letter as I detailed below. Can you do this and send it to me?
Ken responds
Here is the letter…
Please do the needful as soon as as possible with Coutts bank.
And, please make sure the church send the payment to us as soon as they get refunded.
We have been lenient and patient with them all this while.
Image


Ebenezer to Ken
Ok good news, Coutts have credited the money back to the sacred dove account.
I have told Father Jack it needs to be sent to you.

Ken contacts Father Jack
Dear father Jack Onory,

I was told by Ebenezer Shypock that the money has been returned to you.
So i am interested in how the money will get to us.
I will advise that you go to your bank today to make a transfer to us.
Please, make sure you provide a receipt of the transfer once the money is sent.
Father Jack is confused
Why are you demanding money from us? What is this all about? Please explain, What money?
Ken to Jack
Dear father Jack Onory,

Please contact the church auditor, he should be able to explain things to you.
We have had to deal with other father's before you. So, you can also talk to the archdeacon.
I'm sure better explanation from him and the auditor will be okay for you.
No, that would be far too simple and remember Jack and Ebenezer don't like each other
Sir, the Archdeacon is out of the country attending a conference on missionary positions for our upcoming young brothers. If you mean the auditor Shypock, I did receive a message from him about some bank issue, but he is of little consequence being a mere employee of the ministry and not a member of clergy. He may hold favour with other fathers here, but not with me. I am the father in charge of the church. I know nothing of what you speak and why you are demanding money from us. Clearly if we owe you money then I apologise and obviously we will pay you, but I will need you to explain all this in more detail.
Ken explains
Dear father Jack Onory,

This payment plan has been very successful over the years during the time of father Oswald. We never had any issue with him, for these payment.
The last payment received was in 2019. Receipt attached to this email.
The payment for 2020 has been really hard for us to get from you, that was why we had to contact the church. Because we did not hear from father Oswald.
On contacting him, i lent from the then new father Andrew that father Oswald passed away, may his soul rest.
Father Andrew saw our related messages concerning this agreement, and the payment plan. And he agreed to continue this payment with us after seeking church elders advise. But he was unable to send the payment for 2020 to us because, he also felt sick then, due to covid-19. And another father had to step in to replace him.
This payment issue for the year 2020 has been dragging on since a while because of replacement of new fathers. So the continuation to the effect of the payment has been hard to receive. Until father Dougal came in. He also agreed to fulfil this agreement by making sure that the payment for 2020 is made. At first, he sent the money through parcel using courier. But later cancelled it, for the parcel to be returned. The church auditor (Ebenezer Shypock) was called in to transfer the money directly to us on 25th June 2021. That was last month. But we never receive the payment in the account provided. He had to contact the bank, and the money was returned to the church. Promising that the Archdeacon has assured that the money will be sent using another bank.
So, we’re still expecting to receive this payment. We’ll gladly appreciate that you make this payment to us directly.
The previous transfer done by the auditor was unsuccessful. That was why the money was returned to the church.
The total debt is £ 6,780 GBP.
I will gladly appreciate an understanding, and continous cooperation with you and the church.

Father Jack still wants more
Thank you sir, this is an old receipt, I was expecting an invoice for the debt we owe. Please send it to me.
You say you have agreements made by varying people from the church. I will need to see the written confirmation from Father Andrew, Father Dougal and the Archdeacon. Once I have this and the invoice I will authorise payment to you.

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Re: Mr Harrington

Post by paulc » Sat Jul 31, 2021 3:20 pm

In the meantime Ebenezer gives Ken some good news
Yesterday was a very productive day. I spoke to all 3 of my clients and they have all agreed to pay.

They have assured me that payment will be made over the next few days, as I told them additional costs could be applied for further delays.

Time to celebrate, my friend!! We have done well!!

I will forward you a list of more clients next week.
What could go wrong?

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Re: Mr Harrington

Post by bware419ers » Sun Aug 01, 2021 8:59 pm

Unfortunately, I have been away on vacation. During that time, Irene caught the Delta Variant. Update soonest!
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Re: Mr Harrington

Post by paulc » Mon Aug 02, 2021 9:47 pm

Think I may have lost him. He usually sends a couple of emails to me every day, but he hasn't responded to messages sent on Saturday by Father Jack or Ebenzer.

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Re: Mr Harrington

Post by bware419ers » Wed Aug 04, 2021 1:28 pm

I've had no response.
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Re: Mr Harrington

Post by paulc » Wed Aug 04, 2021 11:17 pm

He's back!
Dear father Jack Onory,

Invoice has been attached this email...
Payment should then be made into the account provided below...

<snip account has been reported previously>

Please, provide receipt to this email once transfer is made.
Image

Father Jack responds
Sir, I have checked our bank account and I cannot see that any money has been transferred back to us.
Who told you it had been returned and do you know when?


Surely Ebenezer isn't going to run off with the church's money as well?

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Re: Mr Harrington

Post by bware419ers » Thu Aug 05, 2021 12:10 am

Glad he's back! Nothing to Irene, yet.
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Re: Mr Harrington

Post by paulc » Thu Aug 05, 2021 11:00 pm

Ken thinks Father Jack has received the money
Auditor Ebenezer Shypock told me that the money has been returned to the church. And then, you told me to provide to you the invoice for this bill, as you have the authority to release the funds. This statement above confirms that, you already received the funds back in the account.
Father Jack explains and breaks the news that Ebenezer has left the church
Sir, once I received the invoice from you, I then checked the church account and found the money has not been returned.

The auditor Shypock resigned from the ministry last week. He gave no notice, just walked out. I don't know what he's playing at.

Maybe Ken will get better news from Ebenezer
Brad sent a message, saying that he has sent money to the auditor to send to me.
I have not heard back from Irene and Bernard.
What is this good news you mention!!
Oh dear .....
Hello my friend, I'm pleased to tell you that Brad, Irene and Bernard have all sent me money.
Including the money from the church that I didn't actually send you, I have made over £35,000.

Sadly I don't need you anymore, so hereby terminate our partnership. I have your debt letter, your fake invoices and about 75 other clients to contact, so I can do it all myself.

Thanks for giving me the idea. No hard feelings, eh?

Best wishes
Ebenezer

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Re: Mr Harrington

Post by GrassEater » Sat Aug 07, 2021 3:58 am

I apologize for not being able to post updates on my end, as I've been a bit busy with work. After receiving the corrected invoice of $18,572.00, the lad sent a Citibank bank account that I think I reported. All this nonsense with the incorrect invoice was making Brad impatient, however.
Okay, here's what I'm going to do. I'm sending the money to my auditor, who handles my money half the time anyway. He should get the payment sent as soon as he has the time. Thanks

BD
Please note that when I first started speaking with Mrs. RB, she indicated that she knew the auditor and advised that I get in contact with him about my payment.
Dear Brad Doogan, 

When exactly will your auditor send the money ?
And please, make sure you send to this email the receipt of the payment made into the account. The receipt is very important for confirmation of the payment, and processing.
Thank you...

Md. RB
I don't know, ask him?? Let me know when you've sent him a message. Thanks

BD
Dear BD, 

How would i know ? 
I don't even know your auditor in person.
It is you that supposed to know when he will send the money.
You said yourself in your previous email that, 
"I'm sending the money to my auditor, who handles my money half the time anyway. He should get the payment sent as soon as he has the time". 
Those are your words. 
So it is you that supposed to know if he has sent the payment or not. You should ask him if he has sent it or not. 
If he has sent it, he should provide you with the receipt of the transfer. Then you send the receipt to me. Or better still, he send it to this email address.

Respectfully,

Md. RB
You told me that you knew my auditor and that I'd be speaking with him about this. His name is Ebenezer Shypick or something and he's the one I trust with my money. I don't know you and you haven't been able to give me a straight answer on what the debt is for anyway. So seeing as how I already sent him the money to deal with it, if you want any of it, you'd better figure out a way of talking with him about it

BD
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Re: Mr Harrington

Post by paulc » Mon Aug 09, 2021 9:58 pm

Father Jack to Ken
Sir, the Archdeacon has returned and I have briefed him on the situation.

He is furious, I have never seen him so angry. He was told by the auditor Shypock that you had received the money and everything was settled. He feels this is a huge slight on the church's good name.

Do you have anything in writing where Shypock tells you the money has been returned to the church? I do not wish to be slanderous, but all the evidence points to him stealing the money. This is most shocking.

As a house of the Lord we do not involve the police in matters such as this, but we have contacted the Tribunal of the Holy Office of the Inquisition, who have far reaching powers on church legalities. I assure you we will get to the bottom of this as nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!

If you have any written documentary proof of his lies that would be useful to the inquisition, please forward it me or Cardinal Ximenez who is heading up the inquistion.
No response, so the Cardinal tries
Hola,

My name is Cardinal Ximenez, I am leading the inquisition into the conduct of the ministry auditor Ebenezer Shypock. If you are able to provide any insight into the missing money I would be grateful if you would contact me.

I am also mindfull that the Sacred Dove church still owes you a sizeable sum, which I hope to rectify in due course.


Cardinal Francisco Ximenez
Holy London Ministry - Inquistion Department

Image


The Cardinal will contact Ken in a week's time to tell him the Inquisition has recovered his money from Ebenezer, but I'm not expecting a response.

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