Reverend Quin and his nigerian parish - TATTOOED

[Birlic]

Wednesday - in the morning

- The idiot refuses any cooperation, due to the fact that the whole village laughs at him.
- He has debts and is constantly ridiculed by both friends and neighbors / landlord.
- We will try to frustrate him as much as possible, taking into account the fact that he probably won't offer anything funny anymore. It's already boring and whiny.

I'm thinking of closing the story with a classic dolla-chop... the package arrives in PortHarcourt where a "fake" Reverend Quin shows up at the warehouse and picks up the products.
===

Father Edward... the bad guy.

Son, let me emphasize the following:

Your personal opinions as well as the interpretation you give to the various biblical passages matter only to your parishioners and followers! In front of me, you must listen to my orders and not comment on them!

I noticed that you are trying to impose your will on me, and this bothers me. It means that you have not understood our hierarchy and it means that you still have work to do on what "humility and obedience" means. I want to believe that this will be the last message in which I draw your attention to the fact that you are obliged to obey the orders of your superiors. I am waiting for the material, as previously agreed. A new refusal as well as the delay will lead to a review of our attitude toward your congregation.


I speak very seriously and please take my words into account.
I do not accept any email full of explanations, excuses or pretexts!
Blessings,
Rev. Edward

Elvis... the good guy.

Dear Sir, good morning!

It seems that the situation is constantly improving. The number of infections has dropped this week, so the port authority in Ghana has allowed quarantine to be lifted starting Friday, August 07, 18.00 local time. The ship will probably be able to unload the containers destined for the Ghanaian branch and load other products, and on Saturday afternoon (at the latest Saturday night) it will leave for the next destination: Lagos. Our local manager (Mr. Akwoode Osuzae) will contact you and keep you updated on the evolution of the situation.

Cheers,
Elvis

===

2 hours later, a stubborn lad writes to father Ed:

Good morning Sir and thanks for your response to my mail of yesterday,
please Sir no matter the Situation I and my followers find our self's
we still believe we have right or freedom of expressions, I only said
for me to do any other task or apologized in the manner you are asking
of me,that will be done once I set my eyes on Brother Zach, which
will make me have believe that am pursuing an existing course,more
over I believe a father has every right to advice a son and son that
has become of maturity has the right to accept or not,are you now
saying as a superior or because may be you are older than me if you
ask me to put my hands into a burning fire I must or is a must I do
it? even if you will make me the greatest or highest being in the
world I Will not do such unless if directed by the Holy Spirit, voice
of God my creator.
Thanks and remain blessed.
Quin.

===

10.00 (Lagos local time) - Quin to Elvis... He seems to want nothing more than to wait.

Good morning Mr Elvis Presley,
Thanks for your email and detailed updates there in,for us we have
been on this for over two moths now the parcel has even been stopped
up to thrice before the quarantine clamp down the Ghana port so for us
we do not know the next line or instruction that might come to you
from the sender,all the same let the will of the Holy Lamb be done in
good faith Amen remain blessed
Quin

Elvis:

Dear Sir,
All these details related to the cessation of the delivery are problems related only to your relationship with the Sender.
We, as a service provider, obey the orders received.

Cheers,
Elvis

Quin to Elvis:

Dear Mr Elvis,Yes I do understand the situations clearly and do not in
any way,put the faults or blames on you in any way OK please,for us we
have resorted to the faith of make believe any day/time we are called
upon in regards for the parcel, if not Glory be to the rHoly Lamb.
Quin.

[Linoline]

Dear father Quin,

I do understand your point of view. Believe me, I really do. I have faced trials and tribulations myself. I have been ridiculed by my own people, my own family, when I chose to follow Jesus and become a member of <SNIPPED> church. But the elders and the entire congregation have embraced me and I can truly call them my new family. Some of the ways may seem strange, but the Lord has a purpose with everything He brings on our path in His mighty wisdom. If it is just one minor task that you need to do, then I beg you to please soften your heart and do it so I will get the opportunity to come to you. If you will refuse, then it's the Lord's will that I stay here, but I feel guided by the spirit and I believe that it is the Lord who calls me to go to another country again, like He did with Abraham. Father Quin, let me be a part of this journey and let me have the privilege of being the first <SNIPPED> member to meet you. I will come bearing gifts and financial support and we can work together for the growth of your parish. It will fill my heart with joy to work as your servant among your people, but this can only happen when chancellor Ed gives his blessing and approval and he will only do that once you finish this task.
Please father, don't hold me down. Don't hinder the work of the Holy Spirit.

Shalom,
Zach

[sparky905]

It almost sounds like the lad has the power to make or break this! He must feel good being in control of the siuation........

[Linoline]

In fact he does... if he obeys then we will continue to play. If he doesn't, then Birlic will write an end to this adventure

Dear Brother Zach thanks for all your mails and Suggestion but I
need to let you know may be a little of what you do not know about
me,before I started being hesitant in this issues I have been into it
in obedience for over 5 to 6 months now believing that I and people I
convinced to be my followers are following a right channel to get
closer to the Holy Lamb,but unfortunately things started unfolding
when Sister Dave made me to understand what I was into when she said
I should avoid being like Moses in the Bible that brought the
Israelites out of Egypt but could not enter Land of Canaan with
them,it was then i have to converge a meeting with my follower to
discus what has been going or we have been passing through in the
hands of our assumed or expected to be our Mother Church the <SNIPPED> now Brother Zach what is hard
for them to accept me doing any other thing on your arrival here since
they are genuine and are pursuing a genuine course and are in
existence, Do you know that Parcel they said is at Tema seaport in
Ghana which they have been stopping up and down,few weeks ago the
supposed shipping company wrote a mail to say that the place is under
Quarantine latter those people said the man named Presly had Covid 19
he is now back bla bla that the ship will do one thing or the other by
next week to arrive Nigeria while since on the 28_6_2020 that port has
been in operations,let it be on record that even if that parcel
arrives here with out me and my followers seeing you we might not
receive it,let us know if we are dealing with existing Church or not
after all there has been light given by God Almighty before that of
man which is Electricity,please if you will not be allowed to come
because I refuse to hold the fowl as prove of faith kneeling in front
of the Pyramid, So be it for I will not give the honour and Glory due
to the Holy Lamb to any man
Thanks and remain blessed.
Quin.

Well... I do like that he's being so open with Zach, we can see that it is very likely that we have really lost him and he doesn't want to cooperate anymore. His friends sowed the seeds of doubt.

Father Quin,

Thank you for telling me all of this and let me reassure you that you are pursuing a genuine course. Of course it is. It is a noble cause and the work you have started in your country is a noble work of great value and you will be rewarded in the final hours for everything that you have done.
I do not understand the words you say about sister Dave, I know her as a very kind and dedicated woman who only ever had my best interest in mind and has guided me through many hardships. Maybe you can send me her message so that I can see what she wrote to you. It would be good if any misunderstandings can be cleared up because I can't believe that she would tell you that all your work is in vain. Any work done for the Lord will never return empty and we will all be rewarded for our deeds. Don't you agree?
I don't know anything about the parcel or shipping company, but I do know that many companies are in trouble due to the pandemic. Many collapse or have to close, leaving people without jobs so if it's a few workers falling sick with covid and the company still being in business we have to thank God for his mercy on these people.
Would your fellow believers really hold you back from doing one thing if that one thing would prevent me from coming to you? That makes me really sad. I assumed that you had helpers who are faithful and supportive. I think it would be good if you could try to convince them about this matter and once I arrive we will hold prayer ceremonies and will fast together so your congregation will be built on a basis of faith and stand strong on the rock that is our Lord. I assume that you, father Kingsley, want your parish to stand strong so the name of the Lord may be glorified?

Shalom,
Zach

[Birlic]

- This funny idiot has a deadline until Saturday, to send us a video in which he kneels in front of the pyramid, with that chicken in his hands and apologizes for his sins.
- If he doesn't do this (and Linoline and I are pretty sure he won't), then starting Monday we'll prepare the "exit" through a dollachop operation.
- Every story has an end, and we seem to be nearing that stage... after almost 6 months of having fun with our dear "Reverend Quin" we will try to find another scammer willing to enter our game.
- If you liked our little story, we are happy and we will invite you to another show as soon as possible.

Linoline, thank you for all your help!

[Linoline]

As usual it's been my pleasure! Thanks for letting me in on this amusing bait.

But hey, it's not over until it's over right?

Wednesday
Quin to Zach

Dear Brother Zach.
Thanks for your message which are clearly understood, I want you to
know that asking more of this from me makes me feel bad,I was told
that after building the pyramid and keeping the fowl as prove of faith
every thing will be in place,after then they came up with the issues
of drawing mark which I went extra mile to source funds for,now am
told just because I replied the mail sent to me by Sister Dave in
which I never used any abusive or insultive word Reverend Ed asked
me to apologize which I passionately did to both of them in writing,
and they are now asking me to keel in front of the pyramid with the
fowl on my hand raised up ,please my Brother my conscience and spirit
cannot or doest not accept it,if at all I will,it has to be when I
have seen or received you then it will be done in your present as a
witness, Do you know every details of me even to my house kitchen is
known to them while a church of such magnitude, has not given me any
phone number or WhatsApp number belonging to the Church which is
easily used in sending either pictures or Videos not to talk of that
of any member, even you I would have loved to have yours,every thing
done genuinely should not only be through Email, my main purpose and
objective is to recover lost sheep's back to the kingdom of the Holy
Lamb,please note my purpose is not the money <SNIPPED> Church wants or
intends to Spend over here rather to win back lost sheep's to the
kingdom of the Holy Lamb.
Thanks and be Blessed
Quin.

this is the mail by sister Dave sent to me thanks and remain blessed
Quin

He forwarded Sister Dave's message and another message he sent to her

Thursday
Quin to Zach

good morning how was your night this was the apology I wrote to sister Dave

Zach

Dear father Quin,

I have received and read all your messages and spoke with chancellor Ed this morning. I don't see anywhere in Sister Dave's message that she's discouraging you. I don't see a comparison of her saying Moses couldn't enter the land of Canaan and you not reaching your goal. All I see is that she said that you bring up complaints like Moses did, but the Lord proceeded with his plan anyway and Moses was sent to Pharaoh despite his objections.
Father Ed told me about the task that he wanted you to do and honestly, it's nothing. Imagine walking around in the city wearing a loincloth and guiding 12 goats on a leash. That is what I had to do when I broke one of the rules. You only have to sit on your knees, hold your chicken and apologize. It doesn't seem like a big issue to me and I think you can be glad that this is all they ask, but that's just my opinion. Of course I am biased because I really want to pursue this journey and it is all in your hands now. Chancellor Ed told me that if you don't do this before the end of Saturday they will not permit me to go to Nigeria but will send me to Libanon instead.
May the Lords will be done. I am just a servant and I do have my wishes, but they are futile and unimportant to the Lord. He will send me where he needs me. I hope we will meet soon father Quin.

Shalom
Zach

[Birlic]

^^^ "But hey, it's not over until it's over right?"
YES, of course!

The idiot was silent all day, so I started preparing for next week's operation:
- The ship will leave for Lagos on Saturday morning.
- the PLog warehouse in Lagos will be in quarantine (one of the workers has Covid),
- the ship goes on and unloads the containers in Port Harcourt.
- the idiot will be informed that the package is in Port Harcourt, to be delivered to Lagos,
- somewhere, during the operation, a fake assistant of the reverend will appear there and will take over the package.

12.00 (Lagos local time)
My new local manager (Mr. Akwude) enter the scene... He forwards to Quin an alleged message received from Elvis, along with the text:

As Salamu Alaykum, dear Quin!
Please allow me to introduce myself properly; I am Akwude Orawake and I run the Nigerian branch of PLog as a local manager. My colleague Elvis Presley (from our headquarter) told me that you are an important client and asked me to take special care of you. Alhamdulillah, from the current information that is at my disposal, it seems that on Sunday we will be able to take possession of the packages destined for all of our nigerian clients. The unloading point is the Apapa quay in the Lagos port area. I will probably be able to contact you on Monday morning and establish the delivery details together. I already have all your details and, for a correct authentication of the Receiver, you will have to present an original identity document. All the handling costs are already paid by Sender, so there are no additional costs for you. For compliance, I ask you to reconfirm the delivery details to me, as they appear in the Shipping Invoice and in the internal documents: name and surname for the Receiver, the exact address for delivery, etc.
Masha' Allah!
Akwude Orawake
Regional Manager,
PLog Nigeria,
http://plog.com


On Tue, Aug 5, 2020 at 8:13 PM, Elvis Presley <[email protected]> wrote:
>Mr. Akwude, please take care of the delivery of the package destined for the parish of the Rev. Quin
> and please make sure that everything will take place without any unpleasant incidents.
>The Reverend is a special client and we were informed by the Sender that everything must go perfectly.
>Please make sure that the delivery complies with all the provisions of the regulation and please keep me
>informed of the evolution of the situation.
>
>
>Cheers,
>Elvis

[bobdemol]

Masha' Allah!

Did he become Muslim?

[Birlic]

^^^ Not him! The regional manager is a Muslim... for to give our story a "local color", I thought it would be good to have another religion represented there.

[bobdemol]

^^ Ah ok

[Birlic]

12.27 - The idiot hopes again that he will receive the package and tries to gain time until the ship unloads the containers. How transparent, how predictable!
- He just writes to sister Dave:

Dear Sister Dave.
Good after noon and how are you doing? Please before your acceptance
of my Apology which I believe the Holy Lamb will touch you to accept,
am very sorry for not understanding the first paragraph where you said
that at the end that God still sent him any way,while I was seeing it
you said sent him away, thanks to brother Zach for telling me he
saw nothing wrong in your mail which made me to go through it once
again, please and please see me as your Brother in the Lord and being
human for no one is perfect except the Holy Lamb.
Thanks for your Understanding,remain Blessed
Brother Quin.

===

EDIT

12.43 - It seems that the temptation of the package was quite strong ... the idiot has returned to better feelings and now he promises to send the video footage requested by the old chancellor.

Dear Sir Reverend Edward.
Good afternoon Sir,How are you doing? hope you are doing pretty
well,Sir I forwarded to you the mail I sent to Sister Dave few
minutes ago, thanks to Brother Zach who made me to read Sister
Dave's mail again Sir I believe it is said in a proverb that if you
flogged a child with the right hand you draw him closer with the left
hand to correct him,I have now noticed where I could not understand
well in Sister Dave mail,Please Sir do as well as my Father in the
lord talk to her on my be half, Sir I believe also that you as my
Father in the Lord you will not forsake me for this singular act of
not understanding the words in her mail.
Sir what you asked me to do now that I have seen more than enough
reason to do such,once my wife is back from her visit to her parents I
will do it while she takes video and photographs, which I will
immediately send to you,Sir also help me to thank Brother Zach for
making me to go and re read sister Davina mail and have properly
understanding.
Thanks and remain blessed
Quin

The old Chancellor Edward:

Bishop Quin,

I am always happy when the lost sheep return to their flock, because that means that the Call of Faith is strong and the Holy Lamb watches over our destinies! Hallelujah, amen!
Son, today I am going on my usual monthly trip to our local orphanages, but I will return for Sunday sermon. I hope to find in my Inbox the message that contains the requested materials. Please send the materials (video recording and pictures) also to Sister Dave, so that she can prepare them for our Sunday's discussion.


May the Holy Lamb give you strength and Faith!
Rev. Edward

===

13.15 - Full of confidence, Quin writes to my old chancellor:

Sir Reverend Edward.
Thanks for your mail and also for your understanding I pray that the
Holy Lamb will lead you to and from where you are going back for the
Sunday sermon, I promise to send just as you have directed.
Thanks your son in the Lord
Quin.

- Looks like we'll get some funny trophies again.
- I will be unavailable this weekend, but Linoline will take on all the roles needed to continue the story.
===

The idiot forwarded to Elvis that first message sent by my local manager Akwude... probably to check if everything was fine.
Of course, Elvis confirmed everything.

Yes, I know.
I also received this message from Akwude (my email address was putted in Carbon Copy) and I will follow the situation very carefully.
He is a trustworthy man and has been working for us for almost 10 years, is a devout Muslim and has always solved all the local problems with maximum efficiency.
You can have full confidence in him.

Cheers,
Elvis

[Birlic]

Friday - 11.00 - It was a very quiet day in West Africa, so my customer manager Elvis wrote to the idiot:

Dear Sir,
As I promised in my previous message, I am able to return with useful clarifications in order to deliver the package TRK70333****.
- The quarantine in Teme (Ghana) was lifted a few hours before the deadline (Friday, 18.00 local time), so the port workers they already starting to unload and load new containers on the ship.
- The customs formalities will probably take a few hours, but the ship will head to Lagos tonight. Theoretically, depending on the atmospheric conditions (wind direction, wave size, etc.) the trip lasts between 16-20 hours (there are more than 200 nautical miles between Accra and Lagos).
- if the things go according to schedule, it means that all the nigerian containers will be unloaded in Lagos quays (Apapa) on Sunday night.
- on Monday you will be contacted by our local manager Akwude, for delivery. He promised me that he would personally take care of this package and that he would keep in touch with you constantly.

Cheers,
Elvis

Our plan:

Due to Covid19, the ship will not be able to dock in Lagos and will continue its journey to Port Harcourt. The containers will be unloaded there at the beginning of next week. I have already sent a PM to Bertje, asking what is the situation regarding the Safari trips.
- if the ban has been lifted, then we will try to send the idiot to Port Harcourt.
- otherwise, we will probably organize a classic dollachop.
- I'm still thinking about the option in which the wellknown driver Joojoo leaves with the van from Port Hacourt to Lagos ... it's an idea that deserves to be studied in depth.
- Brother Zach will embark Monday on his journey from the UK to Nigeria... with a "consistent" amount of money (all the salaries and the Diocese's inauguration bonus). He will probably land in Niamey (Niger) and try to cross Nigeria from north to south. I'm afraid for his fate.
===

[sparky905]

If the virus was detected on either the dockworkers or the sailors, perhaps the contents of this shipment will need to be held in a secure facility for 72 hours for any surface virus to die on its own?
The chop might be made easier since everyone was wearing a mask.

If you go the delivery route, it would be a shame if the driver himself tested positive wouldn't it? Then he and the contents would be held somewhere for a period of time. Also, can goats carry the disease? I was imagining a herd of infected goats blocking the road as the delivery man swerves to avoid them........

[Linoline]

Thursday
12:56 Quin

Dear Brother Zach.
am happy and glad to give response to your message, because you made
me to see/noticed the meaning of sister Daves massage i also thank
you for your encouragement and advice may you be blessed by the Holy
Lamb,I can't wait to see you one on one,remain blessed by the Holy
Lamb
Quin.

Friday
12:37

Youtube video 01
Youtube video 02
Youtube video 03















12:44 Quin

good afternoon brother Zach how are you doing today hope you are
doing pretty fine remain blessed
Quin

13:53 Zach, unaware that Quin fulfilled his task

Dear father Quin,

Thank you for your message. I am starting to feel a strong bond with you as my brother in the Lord already. I am waiting to hear news about my trip to you but I already started to get my documents ready because I have faith that the right thing will be done.

Shalom
Zach

14:45 Sister Dave, not really warmed up to our friend again.

Dear brother Quin,

Thank you for sending me these pictures and video's. I will make sure the elders receive them. Father Ed will spend time visiting the orphanages and he will be back on Sunday. After his return, he and the elders will decide whether to send brother Zach to you or not.
Please continue with the preparations for the ceremony, like we discussed before. I will still need the same informations from you that I have been waiting for a long time now.
I have forgiven you for your rude behavior, but I want to emphasize that it really hurt me a lot and I couldn't do my job well for several days. Please don't repeat this.

Be blessed
Sister Dave

[bware419ers]

I have already sent a PM to Bertje, asking what is the situation regarding the Safari trips.
- if the ban has been lifted, then we will try to send the idiot to Port Harcourt.

The status is the same as it has been. For the safety of ITPs, safaris are banned/off the table, for now. One might ask, "How is me sending him 200 miles any different than the lad choosing to travel 200 miles to see family members?" The answer to this should be self-evident.

[Birlic]

Over the weekend

- The package was transported and stored in the PLog warehouses in Port Harcourt.
- The elders of the church have accepted the materials sent by Quin , so Brother Zach will embark on a pilgrimage to Nigeria.
- Linoline had the idea to try to get a dollachop that does not involve (yet) Joojoo or any other employee of the company. We still want to keep the appearance of credibility for PLog, hoping that the safari ban will be lifted at some point and we will be able to send another package.


On Friday night, Elvis gave assurances that everything would go perfectly.

Dear Sir,
As I promised in my previous message, I am able to return with useful clarifications in order to deliver the package TRK70333****.
- The quarantine in Teme (Ghana) was lifted a few hours before the deadline (Friday, 18.00 local time), so the port workers they already starting to unload and load new containers on the ship.
- The customs formalities will probably take a few hours, but the ship will head to Lagos tonight. Theoretically, depending on the atmospheric conditions (wind direction, wave size, etc.) the trip lasts between 16-20 hours (there are more than 200 nautical miles between Accra and Lagos).
- if the things go according to schedule, it means that all the nigerian containers will be unloaded in Lagos quays (Apapa) on Sunday night.
- on Monday you will be contacted by our local manager Akwude, for delivery. He promised me that he would personally take care of this package and that he would keep in touch with you constantly.

Cheers,
Elvis

Quin, excited and happy:

good afternoon sir thanks for the updates God bless you
Quin

===
The first bad news came on Sunday night... Akwude to Quin:

Masah el Kheir, dear Quin!
Unfortunately, one of my workers (a driver from the local delivery team) is infected with Covid19 and was hospitalized. This was the will of Allah, great is his wisdom! Our local warehouse in Apapa is now closed and quarantine and disinfection procedures will follow in the next days. The ship will unload all the Nigerian containers in Port Harcourt, from where they will be redirected to their final destinations. I will keep you updated on the evolution of the situation. You don't have to worry, because there are no additional delivery costs for you. Probably everything will be resolved in a few days. I am sorry for this delay, but we have no way to fight this plague sent by Allah to punish the unbelievers for their evil deeds. Insha 'Allah, we will be able to overcome these difficult moments and we will resume our life as it should!
Salam!
Akwudee

A disoriented idiot writes to Akwude.

Dear Mr Akwude.
Thanks for your mail and information there In does it mean the goods
for Lagos is now at the Apapa way house or does it mean the Ship will
first get to port Harcourt before coming back to Lagos again? I do not
understand what is happening with your logistics, that something sent
for almost 2 months now finds it hard to reach it's final receiving
point is quite unbelievable.
Thanks and remain blessed.
Quin

Quin writes also to Elvis:

Dear Presley Good afternoon.
how are you doing today? please I received your forwarded mail with
utmost surprise, based on the fact that you promised of the ship
coming from Ghana to be arriving Lagos late today Sunday, and that Mr
Akwude Manager of plog and his crew will contact me by
tomorrow and him self ask for reconfirmation of the details as given
by the sender,Now Lagos is before port Harcourt, what is actually
happening, do clarify for me for my mind to be at rest OK?

===
Few minutes ago, Akwude writes back to Quin:

Sabah el Kheir dear customer Quin, I am sorry for everything that happens yesterday but the will of Allah is above us and our powers; this pandemic being a punishment sent to all unbelievers. The packages were unloaded in Port Harcourt and stored in our High Security Facility. We are going to perform the inventory and delivery procedures to the clients. All the Customers who want to receive the packages personally will come to the warehouse, and for the others deliveries will be organized with the company's vans. I will keep you up to date.
Masha' Allah!
Akwude

Elvis is on vacation, so his messages will be taken over by someone else (who won't know too many details about the operation).

===

On the Church side of the story, many messages was between sister Dave, brother Zach and our idiot.

Zach to Quin:

Dear father Quin,

I am excited because I do believe that the judgment will be made in our favor now that I heard that you have fulfilled the task. I believe that we will meet soon. May Gods will be done. Of course, if I'm allowed to go I will keep you updated. I want to ask you to keep praying for this because traveling in times of a pandemic is very challenging.

Shalom
Zach

Sister Dave to Quin:

Dear brother Quin,

Please do not forget to resume with the preparations for the ceremony. I am aware that it might be a while until it can finally take place, but when the time is there we need to be well prepared. Please remember that you need to send me the quotations for everything you need for the ceremony and I need pictures of you wearing african robes for bishops and reverends.

Be blessed
Dave

Quin to sister Dave:

dear sister Dave good afternoon how are you doing today and how is
everyone doing ,please sister Dave I have sent you the quotation
before I am aware of the rob which I will do as you requested thanks
and remain blessed Quin

Sister Dave:

Dear brother Quin,

You have sent me a typed list with prices. This is not the same as quotations, which I have explained to you before. I need those quotations to clear the budget for the ceremony. If you can not provide these, then the ceremony will have to be paid with funds you'll raise yourself.

Be blessed
Dave

Quin to my old chancellor:

Dear Sir chancellor Edward Good afternoon sir how are you doing today
and how is the orphanage home doing today hope they are all in save
health please sir my regards to them all I pray that the holy lamb
will see you throughout the journey remain blessed
your son in the Lord

Quin to sister Dave:

dear sister Dave good afternoon sister Dave thanks for your mail
please do not be offended will it be wise to involve an event planners
so that the total quotation will be given or how do you want it to be
done pls help me out you know I have not been into this before please
my mentor
thanks and remain blessed

Sister Dave:

Dear brother Quin,

If you feel the need to hire an event planner for the ceremony then that seems like a perfectly fine solution for me, so that you can concentrate more on your tasks as the leader of your parish. Please note that you do have to supervise and make sure all the details will be taken care of. Please also give me a quotation of the event planner, so that we can calculate that when we clear budget for the ceremony.

be blessed

Quin to sister Dave:

Dear Sister Dave.
Good morning how are you today? hope the service of today was
fantastic, well the good news over here is that the Government has
given a partial ease of the Lockdown on churches And Mosque just that
it has to be once in a week and on strict conditions and with the
social distance being observed, am happy to have you back on issues
that concerns me and the plans for the parish ceremony, thanks also
for the approval of my suggestions,this is the more reasons why I
pleaded for you not to abandon me half way for it is now that I need
you most in my life,thank you and may the Holy Lamb Bless you
abundantly Amen.
Brother Quin.

Sister Dave:

Dear brother Quin,

Thank you for your message. It is very good news that churches are allowed a little more freedom right now. May the name of the Lord be glorified. Hallelujah!
I am glad to see that we are working towards the same goal, but again, I didn't get any updates from you about the progress that you are making and I wish you'd send me updates a bit more often to make sure that we will keep progressing in our preparations. By the end of tomorrow I expect you to give me a detailed update about what you have done and when you are planning to do the remaining things needed.

Be blessed
Dave

Finally, this morning the old chancellor responded to Quin's message.

Son,

Wwe have all been convinced that you are our Chosen One and that you deserve to receive all the honors due to the Bishop of Africa. Congratulations! The elders of the Church were deeply impressed by the dedication and zeal with which you represent our Faith and accepted my proposal for the official inauguration of your Diocese by sending our brother Zach to Nigeria. He will be with you in your first episcopal sermon and will guide you on the first steps of this noble mission.

I am also glad that everything has been resolved regarding the Courtesy Package, because I know from Sister Dave that you have received, or that you will receive your parcel soon. It doesn't matter how long the road is if in the end the Glory of God and the Glory of Heaven are waiting for you there!


Glory to the Holy Lamb!
Rev. Edward

[Linoline]

Another response to Zach

good afternoon brother Zacharias thanks for your mail and I promise you
that we will be praying for you OK remain blessed Quin

Monday
2:16 (sleepless) Quin to Sister Dave

Dear sister Dave good morning how are you doing today please sister
Dave I want you to understand me when I told you am very rich for
now I don't have any money on me for now is a thing I can get within a
day or two no body will borrow me money here in Nigeria notwhen am
still owning them and here is not like your place that you can get
information online is not that am given excuses because we are not in
the same city or local government please my bp is 183 /120 I don't
even I source to raise money to get my drugs please thanks for your
understanding I still need more time because I want my parish to start
functioning as well no instrument or source to rent a place we can
gather for service am confused here now we only gather in my place or
one of my follower's place too thanks and remain blessed
brother Quin

Why is his bloodpressure such a bad thing? I'm confused

9:02 Sister Dave

Dear brother Quin,

I am not asking you for online quotations, nor am I asking you to purchase anything for the ceremony at this point. I want you to go to the places that sell or rent the things you need and ask for quotations. Written, signed and stamped, with your promise that when the ceremony will be held, you will go back to them for their services. So they will know that they will get the business eventually.
The same goes for the robes. You go to a place where they are made or sold and you try on a few, and make pictures to show us. In preparation for the ceremony we will discuss here if the robes are suited or if there would be any alterations needed. We will get you the budget to have the robes made according to our instructions and you can go back to the same tailor to have them made, so he will get the business eventually.
You see, it's very easy and you are making things unnecessarily complicated again. Please proceed with the preparations and make sure to give me an update by the end of the day.

Be blessed
Sister Dave

10:14 Quin

Dear Sister Dave Good morning and how was your Night, hope you had a
sound night.
please and please do not see me as trying to complicate issues? the
fact remain for now I do not have funds yet to transport my self
around I do not stay in the Same vicinity with people that does all
these things the issues of my being indepted to people or not being
able to live up to expectations gives me a lot of thinking to an
extant that my blood pressures has gone too high than necessary up to
183/120 please understand me,I believe with your understanding and
prayers I believe I will still live up to the promise and the
assurance I gave to you right from the day one we started, in which I
promised that you will not be disappointed.
Thanks and Remain blessed.
Brother Quin.

10:28 Sister Dave

Dear brother Quin,

I'm sorry to hear about your high blood pressure, I will make sure that brother Zacharias will take medications with him for you to use. Meanwhile try to use a diet without salt.
That said, I still need those preparations, because I believe that the Lord has this whole situation in His hands and the day that the pandemic ends can be near, it can be any day and we need to be like the wise maides, prepared with oil in our lamps when the groom comes. I hope you understand this and will do anything in your power to work on those preparations like I told you. You can send someone else to get the quotations or you can call them on the phone and ask to send the quotations to you. There are many possibilities and I expect you to use them

Be blessed
Sister Dave

[Birlic]

The idiot tries to avoid the last task that sister Dave set for him. He writes to Rev. Edward:

Dear Sir Chancellor Edward
Good Morning Sir and how was your night rest?I hope you were guided to
have a sound sleep by the Holy Lamb and Holy Spirits of his,I also
hope and believe you had a good time with the orphans at the orphanage
home? the Holy Lamb will grant you more empowerment and enablement to
continue in your good work Amen
Sir I do not know if it is much thinking I go through every day that
has affected me health wise to an extent that my Bp rises to 183/120
please Sir as my Father in the Lord I and my followers needs lots and
lots of you and the Elders prayers,and Sir please Sir help me to talk
to Sister Dave on my behalf that what she is requestioning from me
will immediately be done once am able to have some funds for run
around in terms of transportation fares,Sir as I promised do your best
for me you will not be Disappointed.
Remain Blessed Sir
Your son in the Lord
Quin.

===

We are preparing the Dollachop operation ... the package will be taken over by someone who will show up at the warehouse, with a mask on his face (for health safety reasons) and with the help of false documents he will deceive Akwude's vigilance.

Quin to Akwude:

Dear Mr Akwude.
Good morning, how was your night?please I do not understand
you,because am meant to understand by the sender that ours will be
delivered to us right here at our home with the address I already
reconfirmed to you,please note am expected to revert back to the
sender as to confirm the receipt of what was sent long ago Asap.
Thanks Quin.

Akwude:

Salam Sir,
Of course, there is no confusion and everything will go according to schedule. Due to the quarantine imposed by the authorities, all the containers have been unloaded in Port Harcourt and will be delivered to our customers in the coming days. There are some customers who have decided to come to us personally to the warehouse, to pick up the packages. Others preferred to wait for our drivers to come home with the packages.
Your parcel #TRK70333**** has been transported and is ready to be picked up at our Eleme - Port Harcourt facility. You can collect the parcel during regular business hours 08:00 to 18:00, Monday through Saturday. The package #TRK70333**** has been placed in our long-term parcel storage Warehouse and will be transferred to the parcel collection Hub on the date that you choose to collect it. Our Eleme office is located in central of Agbonchia area, adjacent to Lord International School, between Greater Evanglism Church and State Primary School 1 Nchia. You will have no difficulty locating the office, because it is very prominent and very well signaled with indicators. Please let us know if you intend to come and collect the package and we will transfer your package to the parcel collection Hub for your inspection and collection. Remember that you will need notify your arrival 24 hours in advance and the parcel must be collected by you in person. Anyway, you don't have to worry because one of our drivers can pick you up from anywhere in Port Harcourt and will take you to our warehouse.
If you prefer the delivery to be made to your address, we will arrange for everything to be resolved with one of our delivery drivers.
Your proper identification can be done with any valid identity document issued by the Nigerian authorities (passport or driver's license or National ID Card).
Masha' Allah!
Akwude

Quin, still disoriented:

Dear Mr Akwude thanks for your mail,please and please I still do not
understand why all these.
The Sender paid all charges and instructed delivery should be to my
address, there is no way I will flowght the instructions because am
far away from Port Harcourt and more over I can't afford the risk of
coming from Lagos to port Harcourt.
Thanks and be Blessed

Akwude, very kind and profesional:

As Salamu Alaykum, dear customer Quin!
I only presented the 2 possibilities; but the customers are the ones who choose one of them. I understand that in your case you want delivery to the address mentioned in the documents and we will organize this operation in the coming days, depending on our logistical possibilities. You realize that this event took us by surprise and we must try to cover the entire surface of Nigeria.
Masha' Allah!
Akwude

[sparky905]

I am anxious to see how this plays out. It's one thing to "chop" him but I hope he believes it actually happened. Maybe brother Zach was mugged and his laptop stolen with all the details of the shipment?

[oblated]

Maybe Quin could be given the challenge of trying to convert Akwude to Christianity. If Akwude was offended that could slow delivery.

[Birlic]

We are preparing the "Dollachop" operation that will take place this weekend.
- Solution #1... a "fake" Reverend Quin will show up at the Port Harcourt warehouse and pick up the package. With a mask on his face and forged identity documents, everything will be very easy to explain later.
- Of course, if the idiot accepts the #2 solution (with delivery to Victoria Island), then that "hypothetical customer from Lagos" will turn out to be a thief who steals the package.

Quin to my local manager Akwude:

Dear Mr Akwude.
Thanks for your prompt response and clarification, please do put us
into much consideration, because the sender has been expecting reports
concerning the receipt of the parcel from me and I need to do as
fast/Asap.
Thanks Be blessed.
Quin.

Akwude writes to our idiot:

Sabah el Kheir, dear customer Quin!
I want to assure you that our full attention is now on solving the logistical problems we have, related to the deliveries we have to make throughout Nigeria. We simply do not have enough drivers available to provide all routes from Port Harcourt operational base to destinations throughout the country. We make every effort to solve all these problems and try to group several packages that have a common destination.
I hope to resolve the delivery of your package as soon as possible.

Please tell me if you would be willing to accept that we hand over your package to another customer from Lagos who comes to us in Port Harcourt on Saturday (or Sunday). He is a businessman who has a furniture store in Victoria Island (Lagos) and who has to take over a whole truck with pieces of furniture brought from Europe. We could put also your parcel in that truck, and you'll pick up the package from his warehouse on Victoria Island. If you accept this solution "in extremis", then I will put you in direct contact with it.

If you still want the delivery to be made directly to your home, then we will probably be able to solve everything somewhere next week. Of course, our offer is still valid for you to come here and pick up the package. It all depends on you, on your schedule and the choice is yours alone. We will proceed as you wish.

Masha' Allah!
Akwude

===

2 hours later, Quin writes to Akwude:

Good morning Mr Akwude
How was your night?
Thanks for your mail and the details there in,please before I will
take decision on your suggestions, I would like clarifications on
these issues Which area in VI and would this attract any further
charges? who would take care of charges of conveying to my
destination? Am asking as to know how to or the way and manners I
would relate to the sender In case if she writes/calls to know the
updates.
Thanks and be Blessed.

Akwude:

Salam mr. Quin,
There are no additional costs, because that client comes to Port Harcourt anyway and takes over his entire furniture transport in a large truck. If you accept this solution, then I will appeal to his goodwill and ask him to take also your package. Of course he won't ask you for money for this, but the package will definitely have to be taken from him from that warehouse in Victoria Island. In no case will he agree to turn to other delivery companies and pay something for it! It is an "emergency" solution and could solve the problem faster.
Otherwise, we will be able to arrange a transport to Lagos next week, which would bring the package exactly to your address.
Masha' Allah!
Akwude

[sparky905]

Please tell me if you would be willing to accept that we hand over your package to another customer from Lagos who comes to us in Port Harcourt on Saturday (or Sunday).

Such a simple but beautiful solution! What could possibly go wrong?

Which area in VI and would this attract any further
charges?

I love how the lad only wants to save money! For the record, I knew that the noble shipping company would not add any further charges. They really are all about customer service!

Perhaps, just before the "chop" he should be filling in a customer service questionnaire? The company is always looking for feedback, esp. during the covid crisis.

[Birlic]

^^^ We will definitely request the completion of the Customer Satisfaction Questionnaire, no doubts!... but, this will only be after we lose the package. To see our idiot's "natural reaction."
- We will execute the Dollachop operation on Thursday or Friday... there is no point in wasting our time, especially since Brother Zach will go to Nigeria with a considerable amount of money.

[sparky905]

It is wonderful to see how this lad became invested in the story, and now, despite the ridicule of those around him, he clings to the belief it is all real and there is a big pay day coming. We know all too well this is what so many victims of scammers experience, it is nice to see it applied to the lad himself.
Yes, it is funny to watch it all unfold, but even as a spectator I love to see the techniques and nuances applied to steer the lad in the desired destination. Pure genius!

[Birlic]

^^^ Ohh, yeah!

Quin to the old father Edward... he just check the situation:

Dear sir chancellor Edward good afternoon sir how are you doing today
Sir I said I should check on you sir thanks Sir and remain blessed by
the holy lamb your son in the Lord Quin

Rev. Edward:

Thank you my son, for your nice words.
I don't feel well at all, due to excessive heat I have breathing and heart problems.
I hope autumn comes as soon as possible because at my age these heat waves are terrifying.

Blessings,
Rev. Edward

I'm going on vacation next week and I need to get Edward out of the story for a while ... he'll be hospitalized.
===

On the other hand, it looks like our problem ("the dollachop") will be easily solved ... the idiot agreed to have the package brought to Victoria Island by that customer of the transport company. Of course, that man will steal the package and stop responding to messages. The PLog company will notify the police and of course our dear reverend Quin will have to send a video statement related to the theft of the package.

Quin to Akwude:

Dear Mr Akwude Good afternoon, now that I have gotten clarification
from you and the Sender has also confirmed that the parcel are insured
do feel free to send through the furniture customer of yours in VI and
I will take from there,I also ask that you give him my Name and
telephone number, also send his to me,also I will expect you to let me
know when either to call him on Saturday or Sunday,
Be blessed.
Quin

Akwude to Quin... only good news!

Salam Sir!I
am glad to hear that you have accepted this unique and immediate solution. Our client may arrive in Port Harcourt earlier (Thursday or Friday), but I do not have confirmation yet. I will keep you updated on the evolution of the situation.
Masha' Allah!
Akwude