From desk of Mr. Joseph Robinette Biden Jr

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AtlasWasTaken
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From desk of Mr. Joseph Robinette Biden Jr

Post by AtlasWasTaken » Fri Dec 04, 2020 3:12 pm

After a sabbatical to the strange regions of New Mexico, Catherine Lemmens is back. This is not a framing device to poorly explain a sudden stop in my baiting activity. Not at all.

Allegedly, USA Elect President Mr. Joseph Robinette Biden Jr is giving some kind of ATM card or whatever, it's all gaff. It was in all caps though, aka. rudeness. Just the thing to begin ragging on:
Dear Joseph,

Who do you think you are to talk to a lady like that!
Even if this fund is coming from the President, you should remember your manners!
I demand an explanation at once.

Yours truly,
Catherine

Joseph did not seem to mind, though.
FROM DESK OF MR. JOSEPH ROBINETTE BIDEN JR, ELECT PRESIDENT USA. THIS IS TO INFORM YOU ABOUT YOUR ATM CARD AND BANK CHEQUE DRAFT BROUGHT BY THE UNITED EMBASSY FROM THE GOVERNMENT OF NIGERIA IN THE WHITE HOUSE WASHINGTON DC WHICH CONTAINS THE SUM OF $20.000,000 DOLLARS CREDITED FROM THE BANK OF AMERICA,THE DELIVERY OF YOUR FUNDS HAS BEEN MANDATED TO BE POSTED TO YOUR ADDRESS THIS WEEK TO YOU AS SOON AS YOU GET BACK TO ME WITH YOUR HOME ADDRESS AND YOUR CELL PHONE NUMBERS.

LISTEN, YOU HAVE TO COMPLY IMMEDIATELY WITH THE INSTRUCTIONS BELOW BECAUSE I HAVE ONLY THIS WEEK TO ATTEND TO YOU BEFORE I STEP INTO OFFICE SO ITS UP TO YOU NOW TO RECEIVE YOUR FUNDS.

BEAR IN MIND THAT I HAVE TAKING MY TIME TO BE IN CHARGE OF YOUR FUNDS TO ENSURE THAT YOU RECEIVE YOUR FUNDS SUCCESSFULLY FROM THE WHITE HOUSE TO REDUCE THE ECONOMY AND I’M THE ONLY ONE THAT HAS YOUR FUNDS AND YOU WILL HAVE TO PAY THE SUM OF $200.00 ONLY BEFORE YOUR ATM CARD WILL BE DELIVERED TO YOU TOMORROW. THE REASON WHY THE FEE IS REQUIRED IS TO HAVE YOUR FUNDS CLEARANCE PAPER FROM THE ORIGIN OF THE FUNDS TO AVOID ANY HARASSMENT FROM THE AUTHORITY AND YOU ARE ALSO EXPECTED TO BE ANNOUNCED AS WINNER OF THE SAID AMOUNT BY TOMORROW AS SOON AS YOUR FUNDS IS DELIVERED TO YOU.

SO YOU ARE URGENT ADVISED TO GET BACK TO ME WITH YOUR HOME ADDRESS AND ALSO THE PAYMENT INFORMATION TODAY FOR IMMEDIATE EFFECT OF YOUR DELIVERY. PLEASE I WILL ADVICE YOU TO URGENT MAKE THE PAYMENT THIS MORNING VIA BITCOIN. I WILL LOOK FORWARD TO RECEIVE YOUR EMAIL TODAY WITH THE PAYMENT TO ENABLE ME GET THE REQUIRED CLEARANCE PAPERS REQUIRED AT WHITE HOUSE TO DELIVER YOUR FUNDS. NOTE THAT THE FEE IS TO BE FORWARDED TO THE FUNDS ORIGIN AS INSTRUCTED AND TRY TO MAKE THE PAYMENT THROUGH BITCOIN.

IF YOU CANNOT USE BITCOIN THEN PROCEED TO ANY MALL OR WARLMART AROUND YOU TO PURCHASE $200 STEAM CARD OR ITUNES CARD AND SCRATCH AND SCAN THE COPIES TO ME ALSO TAKE THE PICTURE OF THE CARD FRONT AND BACK. WITH THE CARDS YOU WILL SUCCESSFULLY RECEIVE YOUR FUND WITHIN 24HRS, YOU HAVE MY 100% PERCENT ASSURANCE OK AND THIS IS THE ONLY FEE.

I LOOK FORWARD TO YOUR RESPOND TO YOUR EMAIL WITH THE PAYMENT TODAY.

REGARD
MR. JOSEPH ROBINETTE BIDEN JR
ELECT PRESIDENT USA
Such a thing needed to be addressed. At least he was compliant to tone down.
What is it you need me to do? I can't see anything with how you write.
Has anyone told you caps lock makes you sound rude too?
I don't care if you are Elect President. You treat a lady with the respect she deserves.
Sorry madam if the forwards I used was rude.
Well let’s proceed to business are you making the payment using gift card or through bitcoin??
To be honest, I know nothing of Bitcoin, which means Catherine knows nothing of Bitcoin, which means the perfect setup to a source of confusion. Not that he's the best teacher, I just want to see if he can be a teacher.
Good to see that you can learn from your errors.
I have to admit, I'm not the best with this bitcoin thing. Could you explain it for me?
Since you are not familiar with bitcoin then I suggest you drive to any mall or Walmart store near you to purchase steam card or iTunes card, scratch and take a picture of the card front and back and forward it to me so that we can proceed with the transaction.
This is the only thing holding the money
Actually, I'd rather you tell me the basics of bitcoin. My church will be accepting donations in bitcoin, you see, so I should at least be informed.
Well bitcoin is also used to receive money from various country do you know any bitcoin machine in your area??
Well, I searched if Bitcoin machines were a thing, and they actually are. He knows that much at least.
I'm afraid not. Not any machine that says "bitcoin" on it, at least.
What medium do you want use and make the payment this is the only thing holding us, can you use cashapp or PayPal??
Suddenly, two more payment methods. No idea what "cashapp" is, and I'd rather go down the Bitcoin route. But first we must clear this up.
Wait, what? A couple days ago you asked if the payment was to be made with either a card or that bitcoin thing. Where did Paypal and whatever cashapp is come from?
Their are many ways in which you can receive your funds
What a linguist.
Alright, so what are they?
Bitcoin
PayPal
Cashapp
Gift card etc
Madam I don’t want us to prolong this issues ok please select one way of making the payment
Let's do this through Bitcoin. Should be good practice.

And we're back on track.
Ok, Do you know any bitcoin ATM machine at your side??
Well, not that I recognise them, that's why I said it should be good practice.
Could you initiate me on what they would look like, for one?
Do you want to use the online, that’s the coinmama??
What even. I've had enough of this, so I had to make things straight.
I wish to use Bitcoin. Let me make this clear, here and now.
With that settled, I'd like you to tell me where I can find one of these Bitcoin machines and/or what they look like.

And that's where we leave off. Almost a week since first contact, and we're still tripping over what a Bitcoin machine looks like. I think this can go for a while; throw a permanent complication just as Catherine will send Bitcoin, and try one of his other avenues.
I have never felt such sublime schadenfreude since I burned the last church of Terra.

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AtlasWasTaken
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Re: From desk of Mr. Joseph Robinette Biden Jr

Post by AtlasWasTaken » Sun Dec 13, 2020 8:02 am

Update: We have gotten nowhere over the past one week. Aside from searching some website, literally no progress was made.

To start, the lad didn't even tell me what those machines are or where I can find them:
On your tab type coinmama
And purchase the bitcoin from the site in this bitcoin address:[[scammer account number thing]]
Slow down a bit. What is this tab you're talking about? And what about the machines?
What state do you stay let me help you try and locate a BITCOIN ATM MACHINE in your area
I forgot to reply to this one, and he quickly asked to go through Whatsapp instead.
Drop your WhatsApp contact for easier communication
Whatsapp is used by the Chinese government to spy on its users. Do not play into their hands.
Let us remain on email.
I live in Alabama, city of Birmingham.
The Chinese government thing will be my go-to excuse whenever Catherine says why she won't use Whatsapp. Back to Bitcoin.
Ok,when are you making the payment to enable us finish this transaction this week??
As soon as you guide me through this Bitcoin thing. Maybe you could give me complete instructions. Preferably with pictures, to show me what you mean.
Ok I will forward you image right now
His "instructions" amounted to a screenshot of his phone, showing the google result for "coinmama". I followed suit and put a screenshot for him.
You will see purchase Bitcoin click to it then purchase Bitcoin in the Bitcoin address I sent to you
What about those Bitcoin machines? I'm on my computer right now. By the way you put it, there are machines solely for this purpose.
And we're back to square one, as always.
Do you know any bitcoin ATM machine??
To avoid all this stories purchase iTunes card forget about the bitcoin
how about no
I have made it clear before, I want to know the basics of doing a Bitcoin transaction.
An Elect President should know how to lead the people, much less a single person. As I suggested before, you could give me a complete list of instructions on how to do this.
Unfortunately, this is where it ends, since when I followed up with him I was greeted with this: Image
I like to think he got so frustrated with Catherine and her questions that he just deleted the account. On one hand I could have kept it rolling a bit if I didn't harp on the "bitcoin machines" thing so much, but seeing that is its own reward.
I have never felt such sublime schadenfreude since I burned the last church of Terra.

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Re: From desk of Mr. Joseph Robinette Biden Jr

Post by pete515 » Fri Dec 18, 2020 5:18 am

Glad to hear that Joe Biden has got his priorities right. I too love payment via Bitcoin scammers and as you say Bitcoin payments are a ripe avenue for delay, exposition and frustration. Shame his email was closed, I am sure the lad would have enjoyed spending even more time explaining the mysteries of Bitcoin to you.
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