His real name is very long and sounds something like Chuckie Cheese. Due to the oddity of the name, my baiting partner Additional Orchid, has suggested naming him Chewie. We'll follow that pattern as it's more catchy than the actual name!
First, he has filled out a form, typing sadly, not handwritten. I will not add it to my trophy cout, but it's an interesting read nonetheless:
I am now working on getting him to submit a proof of faith picture, which should not be too difficult. He is working for my fake lad character, Kariola Tuesday, so when he had a problem, he went straight to him. Chewie is in red, Kariola is in blue.Name: Chewie
Address: Asaba, Nigeria
How did you find out about our holy church:
firstly it is a church of faith and it is a place god reigns.
Your preferred quote from the Holy Book:
1Corinthian 1:30
it is because of him that you are in Christ Jesus, who have become for us wisdom God that is, our righteousness, holiness and redemption.
Briefly describe an event from your life which took you closer to Divinity:
God have been so good to me always I nearly lost my life 3years ago is when I went to stream to swim with my friends suddenly so we started to swim one of my friends punch me then I fainted on the stream so all my friends started running out from the stream and god sent a hunter that save my life.
(was he with friends or was he mugged?)
I would like a monthly payment after becoming a member of the Holy Lamb Church (circle one):
(Yes )/No
Please let us know your top 3 activity priorities after becoming a member of the Holy Lamb Church:
1.I give my life and promised to serve God
2.assist the poor and orphan
3.I promised to serve the holy lamb church
)Please help me out
He had attached the email I sent him, the standard, "give me a trophy" letter.Dear Brother Phillip:
Thank you for your letter which is very kindly received. Let me welcome you to the church of the Holy Lamb! We will try our best to make this path speedy and easy for you.
The second step of accepting the sponsorship of our church is the 'Proof of Faith' picture. All our receivers make them and the pictures of those we assist will be displayed on the wall of our church hall for some time, so all parishioners can be made aware where their tithes go.
I have attached a document that you will need to print. Hold it in front of your chest, and have someone make a picture of you in bright daylight so you will be completely visible and please send that back to me. Please note that the picture should be made outside.
After this we can work on the process of sending the funding and electronics to you to support this project, which is clearly an honourable endeavour. Thanks for your understanding and may God shine His face upon this mission.
Be Blessed
Rev. Ukulele
John 3:16
Kariola replied:
Make you print the image and take snap of yourself holding am abi? Na it the easiest method, have done it before, is no worry.
Nah how to print it out nah problem
Go to internet cafe and print it. Hope you fit find internet cafe for Asaba?
Oh my god is difficult for me on that one
Here comes the fun part!:Mebe you go draw image by hand bro?
Shey he go accept that because my bro no go allowed me to go out on that cyber cafe. I dey message joker one time make me waste plenty ink on forms for joining club. my bro no fit allow me travel to cyber to write clients again e tell me say make I write am from home
So Chewie has been baited before, and wasted so much time printing out someone's forms for a club, that his brother forbade him from going to internet cafes again!Bro, I know he go accept am. I sabi guyman in Awka wey never have enough money for printer, he done hand draw am and send photo of him holding. Is ok my guy.
Tell your brother to message me, make I tell am let you go to cyber.
This may make baiting harder, but hopefully I can talk to the brother, since he does not appear to be an ITP if he really did advise Chewie to write clients from home! More coming shortly!
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