Paul, the gritty excon

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Padme
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Paul, the gritty excon

Post by Padme » Tue Jun 23, 2020 2:42 am

New character, making it up as I go along with no plan like a choose your own adventure story. Picked the lad from random from spam mail. Just started corresponding tonight. Old school email only bait. Let's see if it goes anywhere. If anyone has any ridiculous story line ideas, post them in the thread as we go and we can work them in. The only thing I've thought of in advance for my character is his name is Paul and he's recently been released early from prison thanks to the pandemic. :D
DHL Agent in a format letter wrote:Good day dear,i am your diplomat agent mr Richard Ben from the Dhl delivery company.i am in the airport right now with your Covid19 bonus and compensation card worth the sum of $2.5 million dollars, and it is from the bank of America.so now you will have to respond back to me with your full information,such as
1, your full name and address
2, your direct phone number for easy communication.
3, identification card or passport
4, your Occupation
And you will have to pay the sum of $100 for the release order that is the only fee that you will have to send and you will get your package immediately,Note they will be no deduction until it get to you as assigned by the federal Government who sighed for the delivery,so get back to us once you receive your this message i await your urgent response now.
Paul wrote:Hi. My name is Paul. I live in New York. I recently got out due to the pandemic so haven't had a chance to get a new phone yet. What kind do you think I should get? My work situation is up in the air but before I went down I did a little bit of everything. Basically whatever needed to be done if you know what I mean. I could use some luck.
DHL Agent wrote:get an i phone
Paul wrote:You think that's better than the Galaxy ones? I heard those are good. So much has changed on phones over the last year.
DHL Agent wrote:you can get galaxy, it a better phone
Paul wrote:Yeah, I gotta go looking when the stores open up so I can try them out. Sucks finally getting home and everything is closed. Fuk.
"Your knife will surely cut off your head trust me. Useless man zombie."
"Shege danburuba, your end has come. The spirit of all the people you kill is after you now and you can not excape it. See you in hell dan esika."


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Claus Shaeve
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Re: Paul, the gritty excon

Post by Claus Shaeve » Tue Jun 23, 2020 5:32 am

This sounds like fun, could be some good tips to be had!

Bit of a lame suggestion, but could the lad maybe help Paul back into society by getting him a job at DHL?

After all, he was only in for petty larceny - what have they got to lose? 8-)
:$_lad: x19
:$_crd: x6

"And please stop telling everybody that you want to receive money because of eye brows, envy and jealousy, until you receive your money in your account, then you can tell them" ~ Kelly Craft, US Ambassador to the UN (probably)

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Padme
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Re: Paul, the gritty excon

Post by Padme » Tue Jun 23, 2020 3:54 pm

Ha! Not a lame suggestion at all. The lad seems to have forgotten his format already so it will be interesting to see where this goes. So far it's still chatter about Paul trying to get a phone.
DHL wrote:okay when you get it then let me know
Paul wrote:Yeah. I'll let you know what I think. Where are you located? Are phone stores open back up? Oh shit. You emailed me at 3am. Late hours bro.
"Your knife will surely cut off your head trust me. Useless man zombie."
"Shege danburuba, your end has come. The spirit of all the people you kill is after you now and you can not excape it. See you in hell dan esika."


Woody 2105-? ☠️Accra -> Singapore, Dakar/Rosso/Bmko/Kpndo/Ctnu ☯x6 GoldPith , 🎩x2⌛️
Amos ☠️🛡️🎩 Akure>Kano ⌛️
Godwin 2015-? ☠️🛡️🎩x8 Owerri -> Maiduguri, Lagos/Lomé/Bmko/Kolokani/Bmko/Nioro Bmko/Timbuktu/Bmko/Youri Bmko/Mauritania/Kidira/Dakar>Jail ⌛️
🎩's -West African safaris, France-Dublin w/DSW, etc. 🍟🐐 🎓🎅🏻🎥

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Padme
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Re: Paul, the gritty excon

Post by Padme » Wed Jun 24, 2020 10:35 pm

DHL wrote:Yes i was awake and i decided to text you, yes phone stores are open here and good phone's is there.
Paul wrote:Cool. What city are you in? I know it's been different everywhere. I need to get a phone so I can start hitting up the ladies.
DHL wrote:I am in Texas
Paul wrote:Cool... How's it going down there?
DHL wrote:We thank God
Paul wrote:I don't follow you bro. What do you mean?
DHL wrote:I mean is is going well
He seems to have forgotten he's meant to be scamming me, so I just wrote a long letter back. If he gets back on format, "Patty" will figure into the story later.
Paul wrote:At least one of us is doing well.  Lemme tell you about my day.  It starts at 8 in the fucking no one should be awake oclock in the damn morning.  Why am I awake only three hours after I stopped drinking you might ask?  Because I have to call my PO, that's why.  Not go in, because of the COVID.  But call.  So I call.  But, as you'll recall, I don't have a phone.  So, how did I accomplish this task.  Well, there is a story here too.  And it involves a saggy titty old broad who lives next door and smells like cheetos and stale cigarettes.  I don't know her name so let's call her Patty.  What I do know is I caught her looking at my cock.  So I knew what needed to do.  Sexual favors for phone time.  A little quid pro quote as they say.  Wasn't as bad as I was thinking because I've been doing time these last years and it's been a while since I had a woman.  Any way, of course, I have to sit on fucking hold and of course "Patty" won't let me have one of her beers.  Even though she's drinking.  Bitch.  So I'm on hold for two hours.  Then the PO comes on.  Asks if I'm working or looking for work.  What kind of work can I be doing with the pandemic?  And what am I writing down for experience?  Maybe I'll tell you my experience another time.  I am kinda feeling like we're pals now.  I used to have penpals in the joint, but they wouldn't let me take any of their addresses when I left.  Something about being concerned.  I don't know.  Anyway, are we pals now?  Tell me your day was better than mine bro because I need to know someone is having some luck.
Paul
"Your knife will surely cut off your head trust me. Useless man zombie."
"Shege danburuba, your end has come. The spirit of all the people you kill is after you now and you can not excape it. See you in hell dan esika."


Woody 2105-? ☠️Accra -> Singapore, Dakar/Rosso/Bmko/Kpndo/Ctnu ☯x6 GoldPith , 🎩x2⌛️
Amos ☠️🛡️🎩 Akure>Kano ⌛️
Godwin 2015-? ☠️🛡️🎩x8 Owerri -> Maiduguri, Lagos/Lomé/Bmko/Kolokani/Bmko/Nioro Bmko/Timbuktu/Bmko/Youri Bmko/Mauritania/Kidira/Dakar>Jail ⌛️
🎩's -West African safaris, France-Dublin w/DSW, etc. 🍟🐐 🎓🎅🏻🎥

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SomethingFishy
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Re: Paul, the gritty excon

Post by SomethingFishy » Wed Jun 24, 2020 11:06 pm

I have a strange feeling that Patty cannot be trusted. Paul definitely shouldn't send Patty to the WU with $100 she could use to buy beer... :D
:$_lad: x100+

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Padme
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Re: Paul, the gritty excon

Post by Padme » Thu Jun 25, 2020 6:30 pm

Still waiting for a scam to happen...
DHL wrote:nice meeting you, my day is over face
Paul wrote:What does "my day is over face" mean?  Sounds like something by bro Jimmy used to say when he was deep in the Pabst.
"Your knife will surely cut off your head trust me. Useless man zombie."
"Shege danburuba, your end has come. The spirit of all the people you kill is after you now and you can not excape it. See you in hell dan esika."


Woody 2105-? ☠️Accra -> Singapore, Dakar/Rosso/Bmko/Kpndo/Ctnu ☯x6 GoldPith , 🎩x2⌛️
Amos ☠️🛡️🎩 Akure>Kano ⌛️
Godwin 2015-? ☠️🛡️🎩x8 Owerri -> Maiduguri, Lagos/Lomé/Bmko/Kolokani/Bmko/Nioro Bmko/Timbuktu/Bmko/Youri Bmko/Mauritania/Kidira/Dakar>Jail ⌛️
🎩's -West African safaris, France-Dublin w/DSW, etc. 🍟🐐 🎓🎅🏻🎥

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Padme
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Re: Paul, the gritty excon

Post by Padme » Wed Jul 01, 2020 12:25 pm

Still boring "getting to know you chat" but that's ok.... I'm patient. 8-)
DHL wrote:if you are on whatsapp then let us be talking on WhatsApp,drop your number if you are on WhatsApp then let us be talking there.
Paul wrote:Don't you need a phone for that?
DHL wrote:you need phone, when you get the phone then let me know.
Paul wrote:Yeah, for now we can chat this way.
DHL wrote:Ok. So what do you do for a living?
Paul wrote:I'm looking for work right now. It's been hard since I got out of prison on early release due to Covid. They've been letting out the semi-violent offenders. But it's not been easy getting a job being a three time felon. And I need money. I'm not saying I'll go back to robbing bitches, but it's hard out here.
"Your knife will surely cut off your head trust me. Useless man zombie."
"Shege danburuba, your end has come. The spirit of all the people you kill is after you now and you can not excape it. See you in hell dan esika."


Woody 2105-? ☠️Accra -> Singapore, Dakar/Rosso/Bmko/Kpndo/Ctnu ☯x6 GoldPith , 🎩x2⌛️
Amos ☠️🛡️🎩 Akure>Kano ⌛️
Godwin 2015-? ☠️🛡️🎩x8 Owerri -> Maiduguri, Lagos/Lomé/Bmko/Kolokani/Bmko/Nioro Bmko/Timbuktu/Bmko/Youri Bmko/Mauritania/Kidira/Dakar>Jail ⌛️
🎩's -West African safaris, France-Dublin w/DSW, etc. 🍟🐐 🎓🎅🏻🎥

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Re: Paul, the gritty excon

Post by LilRachel » Wed Jul 01, 2020 12:43 pm

Patience is a virtue! Applicable for all delivery companies btw ;)
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Re: Paul, the gritty excon

Post by Padme » Fri Jul 24, 2020 8:06 pm

The lad has been silent for the last month but messaged Paul today. The (very) slow bait continues.
DHL wrote:Have you get the work?
Paul wrote:Yo, good to hear from you. I had to do some side jobs, if you know what I mean. But they panned out which was good. So I was able to able to keep the place. Also, I've come to an understanding with my landlady and I learned some more about her. Interesting stuff. You on hangouts?
"Your knife will surely cut off your head trust me. Useless man zombie."
"Shege danburuba, your end has come. The spirit of all the people you kill is after you now and you can not excape it. See you in hell dan esika."


Woody 2105-? ☠️Accra -> Singapore, Dakar/Rosso/Bmko/Kpndo/Ctnu ☯x6 GoldPith , 🎩x2⌛️
Amos ☠️🛡️🎩 Akure>Kano ⌛️
Godwin 2015-? ☠️🛡️🎩x8 Owerri -> Maiduguri, Lagos/Lomé/Bmko/Kolokani/Bmko/Nioro Bmko/Timbuktu/Bmko/Youri Bmko/Mauritania/Kidira/Dakar>Jail ⌛️
🎩's -West African safaris, France-Dublin w/DSW, etc. 🍟🐐 🎓🎅🏻🎥

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Re: Paul, the gritty excon

Post by sparky905 » Sat Jul 25, 2020 6:53 pm

old broad who lives next door and smells like cheetos and stale cigarettes
There are just some things I don't want to think about................

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Re: Paul, the gritty excon

Post by Padme » Thu Jul 30, 2020 11:51 pm

We've moved over to Google Hangouts. Still not very exciting, however he seems to have forgotten he's meant to be conning me about a DHL package.
Yo, it's paul.
How are you doing best friend
yo, good brother. how you doing?
it's as hot as lucifer's ball sack here today though
I need to score some cash to buy an airconditioner and I'm not above the shady if you know what I mean. desperate times, man.
I am fine
You will have to look for some cash and buy the aircondition

Exactly.
And after that then you will have to think about any other thing.
Hope you are receiving big salary?

I'm doing side jobs. So it depends on the job. You know I got out of prison not that long ago.
How much are they paying you per day?
It's not that kind of thing bro. It's like I just do what I got to do. So the amount changes.
The amounts changes?
Yeah. Because it's not like a company job bro
Is it home job?
You mean second story work? Sometimes. 😂
Like how much do you normally get per day?
Not gonna lie. It's been hard since I got out. I've had to do some shitty jobs.
They use to pay you $50
So are you on WhatsApp?
Hello

yo, no don't have it. sorry aint been around. drama with my neighbor. Patty Jean. She was supposed to give me some money but she ended up giving to her "boyfriend".
shes always going for these stupid dudes.
she gave me like $20 and i was supposed to go back for the rest the next day but then she went off and sent it out.

Wow
You will soon get a better job
I wanna see your pictures,i want you to send me your pictures

Oh yeah? Ok. You too bro. Let's see you.
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Where are you?
Nigeria
Cool
No explanation or mention as to why he's just dropped the scam. :lol:
"Your knife will surely cut off your head trust me. Useless man zombie."
"Shege danburuba, your end has come. The spirit of all the people you kill is after you now and you can not excape it. See you in hell dan esika."


Woody 2105-? ☠️Accra -> Singapore, Dakar/Rosso/Bmko/Kpndo/Ctnu ☯x6 GoldPith , 🎩x2⌛️
Amos ☠️🛡️🎩 Akure>Kano ⌛️
Godwin 2015-? ☠️🛡️🎩x8 Owerri -> Maiduguri, Lagos/Lomé/Bmko/Kolokani/Bmko/Nioro Bmko/Timbuktu/Bmko/Youri Bmko/Mauritania/Kidira/Dakar>Jail ⌛️
🎩's -West African safaris, France-Dublin w/DSW, etc. 🍟🐐 🎓🎅🏻🎥

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TempoOfDoom
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Re: Paul, the gritty excon

Post by TempoOfDoom » Sat Aug 01, 2020 11:49 pm

Awww. Poor fella. He's lonely. He feels sorry for you. He wants a penfriend.

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Re: Paul, the gritty excon

Post by Linoline » Mon Aug 03, 2020 10:48 am

Wow, just when I thought 'that doesn't really look like texas' he drops the bomb that he's from nigeria. He must've felt comfortable talking with the ex-con. :lol:
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Padme
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Re: Paul, the gritty excon

Post by Padme » Wed Aug 05, 2020 12:58 am

Guess so. He's now given up on scamming Paul entirely and decided that he wants in on Paul's small time grift of Patty, who sounds like she may be in the grips of a romance scam.

Are you on WhatsApp?
No. I don't have a phone. I took my neighbors phone while she was sleeping. Gotta bring it back before she notices. Lol
Do you have an id card
Why do ya ask bro?
Nothing i just ask
Good morning friend

Hey bro
How are you doing?
Good. What are you up to
I don't understand
What do you mean?
Happy new month friend
Don't understand what bro?
I dont understand what you mean by what am i up to
It means what are your plans for the weekend. You know... Like. What's up.
Nothing oooo
I am down without money
Sorry bro. I know the feeling.
What are you going to do?

I don't know what to do
I am even hungry now
But no money to buy it

Wow. That sucks.
That is it friend
Meanwhile my neighbor has money and she's sending it to some boyfriend she met online last year instead of helping me out even though I slept with her nasty ass.
She acts like she's a saint just because she lets me use her phone sometimes

Introduce me to her since she has money let us use her and make money
The only thing is she is 60 bro. Do you want an old lady in your life? 🤣
Age does not matter since she has money
I can manage her
Do you have her pictures? So i can see it

I'll get one
We gotta figure out how to play it too
Lemme talk to her tonight and try to get we information out of her

The game is on you
We need to be rich

We can work it together bro.
Yes we can do it together,we need to get much money from her
Just know how to connect me to her

Sounds good.
Know how to do it so she can fall in love with me
I will be waiting to here from you with the pictures too
"Your knife will surely cut off your head trust me. Useless man zombie."
"Shege danburuba, your end has come. The spirit of all the people you kill is after you now and you can not excape it. See you in hell dan esika."


Woody 2105-? ☠️Accra -> Singapore, Dakar/Rosso/Bmko/Kpndo/Ctnu ☯x6 GoldPith , 🎩x2⌛️
Amos ☠️🛡️🎩 Akure>Kano ⌛️
Godwin 2015-? ☠️🛡️🎩x8 Owerri -> Maiduguri, Lagos/Lomé/Bmko/Kolokani/Bmko/Nioro Bmko/Timbuktu/Bmko/Youri Bmko/Mauritania/Kidira/Dakar>Jail ⌛️
🎩's -West African safaris, France-Dublin w/DSW, etc. 🍟🐐 🎓🎅🏻🎥

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