Goofy crap your lads wrote

Myon359 · Post by **Myon359** » Sun Apr 21, 2024 2:08 pm

My current "romantic soldier in Afghanistan" lad is coming up with some humdingers:

I love drowning and listening to music

What is your favourite food?
...
I love you rice, and checks.

After being asked to clarify "checks" he replies:

I love cheaken.

Post by **bware419ers** » Mon Apr 22, 2024 12:44 pm

Post by **Fatter Siam** » Tue Apr 23, 2024 10:52 pm

A lad I baited comes at me with a new format -

I am contacting you concerning a deceased customer and an investment he placed under our banks management ...In 2009, the subject matter Dr Thomas .J. Irritatedbowel (A Neurologist) , now deceased, came to our bank to engage in business discussions with our private banking division...In mid-2010, Dr Thomas J. Irritatedbowel asked that his money be liquidated because he needed to make an urgent landed property investment requiring cash payments in Spain...What I wish to relate to you will smack of unethical practice but I want you to understand something. It is only an outsider to the banking world who finds the internal politics of the banking world aberrational....MY PROPOSAL IS THIS: You share a peculiar detail with the late fellow-in this case, you both are from the same country and share the surname Irritatedbowel.

Jimlad · Post by **Jimlad** » Wed Apr 24, 2024 8:18 am

Myon359 · Post by **Myon359** » Wed Apr 24, 2024 6:41 pm

Fatter Siam wrote: ↑Tue Apr 23, 2024 10:52 pm
You share a peculiar detail with the late fellow-in this case, you both are from the same country and share the surname Irritatedbowel.

No kidding

One of mine, a Russian (maybe) lad:

Sir, please understand that all telecom are being monitored here in Russia and it is not advisable talking about this matter on phone to avoid me exposing something is required to be a secret so I am very comfortable we will be working with mail till I am able to leave Russia.
. . . . . . . . . . . .
For further discussion in case of clarification you can call me on the below number.

jayhawk · Post by **jayhawk** » Wed May 01, 2024 7:17 pm

No goofy crap your lad wrote thread would be complete without something from the infamous Mr. Humphere. The first came after he was informed that his video testimony in the murder trial of the orphan Feathers, when played in court, had somehow been replaced with midget tranny porn and a video of him having sex with a goat.

something happened last night but i did not know how to tell you or how real it will sound to you,i did not sleep till the next day because the moment i close my eye, i found a lot of demons fighting me so i have to take enough coffee not to sleep,
but here is the real thing. in the morning when i decided to go and meet with my pastor to seek for prayers and anointing oil, the moment i step four pools from my house,there is this popular mad man around the hood, immediately he saw me, he continue to follow and insist he has a message for me until i gave him money he will not tell me, but ignore him, he follow me to the place i want to enter taxi, so to save my self from the embarrassment, i gave him ₦20 in our currency here but what he told me was shocking as this is the first time in my life i have witness such, he said it in our language

Later on he sent this gem:

[Also i know how inquisitive all this press can be, i hope the picture of the goat fucking me is not on news or news paper

Post by **bware419ers** » Wed May 01, 2024 11:17 pm

^^^Who doesn't love Mr. Humphere?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SG4HENi ... 9Eater.com

jayhawk · Post by **jayhawk** » Thu May 02, 2024 2:17 pm

^^ He was so proud of that hair and really pissed when we made him shave it off.

Jimlad · Post by **Jimlad** » Thu May 02, 2024 9:58 pm

Hello how are you doing today, this is the president of America Joel Biden

Myon359 · Post by **Myon359** » Thu May 09, 2024 4:05 pm

Not quite goofy but still worth noting:

You need to urgently provide your personal number...unless you deliberately wanted to add sand to my grave because I am going straight to commit subside I am going jump into the river and kill myself

Jimlad · Post by **Jimlad** » Sun May 12, 2024 10:05 am

After being presented with a very badly forged certificate that had a printed name and signature that didn't match, I decided to point out that I could not accept it on the basis that is was a dreadful and amateurish fake.
The lad decided to go all Donald Trump on me with this priceless comment:

Please note: the document is legal and not forgery.
You cannot be wise in your own eyes, the mistake you observed or you’re seeing is only in your own eyes and your mindset and it’s not real.

Jimlad · Post by **Jimlad** » Wed May 15, 2024 3:03 pm

YOUR PAYMENT OF US$900 Billion USD IS READY TO RELEASE TO YOU TODAY

I think I'll solve world hunger with that one!

Post by **Kitty La Gore** » Fri May 17, 2024 11:03 pm

From a FB exchange I'm having with a lad who claims to be in a geographical location where he would have seen the Northern Lights if he were really there:

me - Did you see it???? ❤
him - See what?
me - The Aurora Bidet or whatever the light thing is
him - Do you mean Aurora Budget? Can I ask you a question?
me - is it about the budget?

I'm fascinated to hear more about the Aurora Budget!

Post by **crashhoot** » Sat May 18, 2024 12:47 am

I would be fascinated to hear about the Aurora Bidet!!

Post by **Kitty La Gore** » Mon May 20, 2024 2:10 am

I was going to make a joke about lighting a colorful fire under his ass, but he turned it around into a budget. Lads only have one thing on their minds....

Post by **bware419ers** » Mon May 20, 2024 12:34 pm

crashhoot wrote: ↑Sat May 18, 2024 12:47 am I would be fascinated to hear about the Aurora Bidet!!

It involves blue icing on a birthday cake, I'm sure...

Post by **Fatter Siam** » Wed May 29, 2024 3:16 pm

Received this on Monday -

I write to acknowledge the receipt of your email with all content noted,

well if you dont send the fee today i we stop emailing you and cancel your fund for last time ok

and Tuesday -

I write to acknowledge the receipt of your email with all content noted,

well if you dont send the fee today i we stop emailing you and cancel your fund for last time ok

and 2 times today and counting

Post by **b8enjoyer** » Wed May 29, 2024 6:37 pm

Please I was informed that because of rate of fraud to at is going on from now on I will need you to mail the cash !!

He's usually a lot more coherent than this, I must have really confused him with my talk of him having to phone MoneyGram for a reference number...

Post by **b8enjoyer** » Sat Jun 01, 2024 7:18 pm

Got another from the head of the M23 rebel movement today:

Drop deep and resort to your think tank

I can only assume this is his way of saying "think about this", because I doubt he thinks my character runs a think tank.

SuckerPunch · Post by **SuckerPunch** » Tue Jun 04, 2024 5:44 pm

This one just came in. Kind of hard to parse since he’s terminally allergic to punctuation.

. . . he might not accept to do that again because is a disrespect to him and he is a turkey man ok.

Bait in progress and hopefully more little gems to follow.

Post by **b8enjoyer** » Wed Jun 12, 2024 6:31 pm

A lad just decided to go full romance scammer on my character, using the classic "soldier stationed abroad" format, but they also attached pictures of "herself" - three pictures of obviously separate women, especially since one has long blonde hair and the other has short dark hair.

Also, interestingly enough, she's claiming to be over twice the age of my character, which I assume is just a product of these formats being geared to target retirees.

jayhawk · Post by **jayhawk** » Tue Jun 18, 2024 10:30 am

Mr. Humphere, another satisfied customer of a certain delivery service we all know and love.

MY IDIOT YOU REMEMBER THAT CURSE YOU WERE TALKING ABOUT? TODAY I RETURN IT AND REVERSE IT TO YOU. IT ALL BELONG TO YOU NOW , I DECLARE IN JESUS NAME THAT FROM TODAY YOUR CURSE AND EVERYTHING THAT WILL COME FROM YOU ARE CURSE, ALL MY CHALLENGES MY BAD AND MY BAD SIDE NOW BELONG TO YOU, I AM FREE NOW AND YOU WILL SURFER MY SURFER AND YOU AND YOU HOUSE HOLD WILL DIE ON IT, FOR YOUR INFORMATION THE DELIVERY COMPANY SAID THEY HAVE THE PACKAGE NOW HOW CAN I CASH THE CHECK WHEN THAT YOUR STUPID DELIVERY COMPANY HAS THE STUPID PACKAGE? FOOL, I DECLARE YOU YOU CURSE FROM TODAY, YOU HAVE CARRIED ALL MY BAD FROM TODAY AND SO SHALL IT BE.

Thursten3rd · Post by **Thursten3rd** » Fri Jun 21, 2024 3:21 pm

He gave you his surfer? How cool is that>!

jayhawk · Post by **jayhawk** » Fri Jun 21, 2024 9:23 pm

^^ Oh, he surfered and surfered.

Post by **bware419ers** » Wed Jun 26, 2024 9:46 pm

But he did lurve himself some poops.

Mod Awarded Icons

User Icons

Mod Awarded Icons

User Icons

Mod Awarded Icons

User Icons

Mod Awarded Icons

User Icons

Mod Awarded Icons

User Icons

User Icons

User Icons

User Icons

Mod Awarded Icons

User Icons

Mod Awarded Icons

User Icons

Mod Awarded Icons

User Icons

Mod Awarded Icons

User Icons

Mod Awarded Icons

Mod Awarded Icons

User Icons

Mod Awarded Icons

User Icons

Mod Awarded Icons

User Icons

Who is online