The funny adventures of Ahmed from Ghana
Posted: Wed Sep 16, 2020 10:38 am
- I have a character (Robert Zalee) that I usually use only for short, fast-paced stories involving Lenny and some payments through MoneyGram.
- Robert is 93 years old, he is an English gentleman who lives with his younger (only 81 years old ) brother Lenny.
- Robert has difficulty understanding the various business proposals made by email, so he asks to be called.
- Subsequently, he pays the required fees very easily, but unfortunately the MoneyGram CallCenter does not release that MTCN.
- Robert is innocent and doesn't understand anything... that's the kind of the script I use for this special character.
Sometimes, I get an idiot who promises a lot, so the stories get complicated properly... this is also the case of this idiot from Ghana.
===
Stage #1: The beginning
- This story began in early September, when Robert's inbox was flooded with several business proposals, all of which came (what a pleasant coincidence ) from Ghana.
- Later, it turned out that these messages were related to each other and all led to the same main character: Mr. Alhaji Ahmed.
- I think this scammer Alhaji use multiple email addresses and also he gave Robert's email address to other friends (also scammers) as they all tried to take advantage of the old man's naivety.
The scammer Alhaji appears from the deep blue and writes to my old character Robert:
Here is a friend of him:
- Almost all these idiots tried to talk to Robert on the phone, so our dear Lenny had some interesting conversations: https://sites.google.com/view/call-recordings
* Alhaji Amed WU Managing Director - 3 times
* Diplomat Alex Goodman - 3 times
* UN Ambassador Kenneth Kanda - 4 times
In the end, only Alhaji remained "active" and qualified for the next stage od the story: the payments.
Robert to Ahmed:
===
Stage #2: The DollaChop operations
I continued to annoy him for a week, but at one point I felt that Alhaji's patience was coming to an end, I invented a new character (a fake barrister Obi Ofalase) who sent the following message to Robert.
My fake lad to Ahmed:
We will continue.
- Robert is 93 years old, he is an English gentleman who lives with his younger (only 81 years old ) brother Lenny.
- Robert has difficulty understanding the various business proposals made by email, so he asks to be called.
- Subsequently, he pays the required fees very easily, but unfortunately the MoneyGram CallCenter does not release that MTCN.
- Robert is innocent and doesn't understand anything... that's the kind of the script I use for this special character.
Sometimes, I get an idiot who promises a lot, so the stories get complicated properly... this is also the case of this idiot from Ghana.
===
Stage #1: The beginning
- This story began in early September, when Robert's inbox was flooded with several business proposals, all of which came (what a pleasant coincidence ) from Ghana.
- Later, it turned out that these messages were related to each other and all led to the same main character: Mr. Alhaji Ahmed.
- I think this scammer Alhaji use multiple email addresses and also he gave Robert's email address to other friends (also scammers) as they all tried to take advantage of the old man's naivety.
The scammer Alhaji appears from the deep blue and writes to my old character Robert:
From another email account, he writes to Robert:My Name is Mr.Ismail Alhaji Ahmed, I am the Western Union Managing Director West Africa. But I live in Ghana West Africa; I am a citizen of Ghana West Africa.
Note:for your information two young men was arrested by financial task for money laundry in our bank and according to the report investigation came from our customer care that you have been paying upfront money to them for long and they are claiming to be diplomatic personnel to you.(THE TWO YOUNG MEN RUN AWAY FROM NIGERIA TO MY COUNTRY GHANA),of which you have not seen any improvement of delivery of funds to you for many years and they are planning to use all the upfront money that you have been sending to them to sponsor your consignment of funds out of Africa to Dubia for their self use only. I was ordered by the Ghana Government to inform you and send back your lost upfront money recovered from them and your funds back to you immediately without any delay.
Please for more details there is some vital information which I would like to disclose to you but I cannot put them on mail writing because there so many scam on the Internet which I am trying to avoid. For further details please get back to me immediately as soon as you receive this email message with the following details:
Full Names:
Contact Address.
Tel/Fax Numbers:
Age/sex:
Occupation: Nationality:
Identity for identification of trust
I await your swift urgent response to act upon...........
Peacefully.
Mr.Ahmed.
Western Union Managing Director West Africa.
Private number:+233-555-422-***
The same scammer, with another character:Attn Sir,
Urgent message from Directorate General Ghana Civil Aviation Authority KOTOKA INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT ACCRA GHANA...?
I received your information on my desk from the Presidency’s Office, after a (Summit Meeting) that was held by the United Nation, that is why I was ordered by (Inspector general of Ghana police service Mr.David Asante) to contact you and let you know the present new development taking place here in our country Ghana.
We decided to contact you, after much investigation which was carried out by the Bureau of National Investigation (BNI) to make sure our country is free on this fraud less crime activities going on in the whole entire world today, because some of these men are using the name of our good office to act in this criminal activities only.
We cut two young men at the KOTOKA INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT, which are claiming to be a Diplomatic agent personel to you, we cut them with a metallic trunk box , and we
detected that these box contains, some huge amount of United State Dollars. After much investigation we found out that these men were among these fraudulent artist,
spoiling the good name of our beloved country Ghana . They opened up to us that, the funds were supposed to be deliver to you through diplomatic means there in your country.
The two young men run away from (Nigeria to my country Ghana)Now they planned to turn back on you and decided to take the money by their self out of Africa and of which you have spent a lot of upfront money on transferring the funds into your bank account or diplomatic delivery means over there to you in your country, they planned in using all the upfront money which you have been sending to them, to sponsor the shipment of your consignment funds out of Africa to Dubia for thier self use only . Now they have opened up to us that they are in a group and they are 4 men and also with a lady.
As I write you this email now, the 2 men that were cut are now under the custody of the Bureau of National Investigation (BNI) investigating desk, while we are trying to track the other 2 men left also with the lady. I will advise you, never have you opened up this present new development to them that you are aware of, so they will not ran away from the country.
That is why we have to reach you by your contact that was collected from them, so we can make the arrangement on the shipment/transfer of the funds to you.
Your response will be very much appreciated as soon as you have received this email and also your call will be very much important at this time, because communication is very necessary.
Thank you for your kind attention, for us to make sure our beloved country Ghana , bears a good name.
please you are also invited to come over to our country urgently before two week from today to claim your funds your self at the airport in my country Ghana i'm there waiting for you,so that you can deposit the funds your self into your personal account as long i'm concern,this is my advice for you to claims?
Regards.
Gen Ben Kamokai
Directorate General Ghana Civil Aviation Authority
KOTOKA INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT ACCRA GHANA
Direct line:+23355945****
Personal note: This telephone number belongs to Ahmed, and he will appear later completed on the application for admission to the church).
===Greetings to you Sir,I am Mr.David Asante-Apeatu IGP Ghana,please address my name properly as Mr.David Asante-Apeatu
Like I told you earlier Mr.Robert, if you want to receive your funds legally from West Africa Ghana.
the only person who is in charge of your funds here in Ghana currently is the Western Union Managing Director (Dr./Alhaji Ahmed Ismail)
Please contact Dr./Alhaji Ahmed Ismail is your representative custodian to you funds do i made myself clear,every authorization approval release of your funds have already been given to Alhaji Ahmed Ismail.
Due to my busy schedule regarding the upcoming presidential election at hand I'm very busy. That was the reason why we appointed your funds transfer assignment to Dr./Alahaji Amed Ismaila to be a custodian to your transaction here in my country Ghana.
always keep me posted and update every details of the transaction for more advice?
i hope to hear from you soon
David Asante-Apeatu
IGP.
Here is a friend of him:
Another ghanaian scammer is trying to get something from Robert:H.E. KENNETH. KANDA
Ambassador & Permanent Representative of
The Republic of Ghana to The United Nations
Attention: Mr. Robert Zalee
I wish to extend my warmest regards to you and your entire household and I hope my mail finds you in the best of health
.
Haven been appointed and accredited as the Ambassador and Permanent Representative to the UN, it would be my pleasure serving before my office with my utmost humility and sincerity during the course of this transaction and also do acknowledge that my involvement in this is strictly recommended by the authority which leaves me with no other option other than performing my duty, taking responsibility of my daily obligations as the ambassador to Ghana and Permanent Representative to the United Nations.
.
have been mandated to feed you with all legal information's on how best your best can and will be delivered to you in accordance, I don't take pleasure in been misinterpreted for my personality because I have no thoughts or intentions of having you scam of your funds.
Mr. Robert Zalee this information going to be needed from you.
1, Full Name:
2, Delivery address
3, Occupation
4, Age
upon the instruction you are further likely to receive from my desk to enhance the delivery of your boxes without any sought of hesitation through me and also do acknowledge that only upon the presentation of the above documentations shall the said consignment be delivered to you successfully as stated.
I Will be awaiting your prompt response in respect of this transaction, kindly find below an attach copy of My Authorized Identity Card. Hope to hear from you
Regards
HE Mr. Kenneth Kanda
Ghanaian Ambassador & Permanent
Representative to the United Nations
===Dear Beneficiary.
Mr. Robert,
How are you doing Hope everything are Okay with You, cause have tried to reach to inform you about the successful delivery of your $8.5 Millions USD Two Consignments Boxes
Am contacting you to inform you that everything about the Delivery of your Two Consignments Boxes is 100% surely Delivery that will successfully get Complete with the Need Documents you where getting Obtain Signed by you the Rightful Owner Beneficiary of the Two Consignments Boxes,
Please do get back to me with your complete home delivery details and your Direct Telephone number to reach you on Time. and if You want your Funds delivered to your Home Or delivered to your Bank or any Bank you want your Funds delivered to, upon making a Direct Deposit of your Funds that will be done successfully with the Documents that will be Obtain in Place,
Please do get back to me with your complete home delivery details and your number to reach you on Time.
Thank You.
Diplomat Alex Goodman
- Almost all these idiots tried to talk to Robert on the phone, so our dear Lenny had some interesting conversations: https://sites.google.com/view/call-recordings
* Alhaji Amed WU Managing Director - 3 times
* Diplomat Alex Goodman - 3 times
* UN Ambassador Kenneth Kanda - 4 times
In the end, only Alhaji remained "active" and qualified for the next stage od the story: the payments.
Robert to Ahmed:
Ahmed to Robert, a long wall of words... he's still stick on his script:I don't want to upset you, but I didn't understand almost anything in your message. It's too long and too complicated for me. My name is Robert Zalee and I'm a World War Veteran. I am 92 years old and live in Liverpool UK with my brother Leonard (Lenny). He, at his 81, is much younger and takes care of me. I think I would love to talk to you on the phone, because things get much better when two people talk directly. Do you think it's possible to talk with me and explain all of this complicate things? Our house phone number is +44LENNY. Thanks. Robert
Robert:Many thanks for your prompt email response to me and the content of your message are very clearly well understood noted:Please find attached is a report i receive from the (Inspector general of Ghana police service Mr.David Asante) this morning this is to officially inform you that i personally put a stop order to every illegal transfer/delivery of transaction in my country Ghana ever since, because of the criminal/bad personnel you people are transacting transfer/delivery of funds with here in West Africa ever since many years ago.
In receipt of WAMA - CREDIT ALLOCATION to payout your outstanding Investment payment to you,like i told you earlier that your funds was deposited under the airport Standard Chartered Bank security vault, We hereby notify you that your Fund as been re-allocated to Banque Atlantique Populaire Groupe on a Credit Facilitated Deposit Account in your name.
Since your Fund has been Re-allocated to a Credit Deposit Facilitated Account in a Bank In Republic of Ghana Standard Chartered Bank security vault WAMA - CREDIT ALLOCATION to payout your outstanding Investment payment to you.
At this point in Time I have done all my home work and I must confirm to you that I have set all legal logistics in place to
make sure you are been paid.
I was ordered by the office of the presidency to inform you and send back all your lost upfront money/your funds back to you immediately urgent without any delay obstacles interference as a compensation to you immediately.
more so i will advice you to calculate all your lost upfront money to me immediately and all scan copy of receivers names you are sending money to here in west Africa,so that i place it in the bank data base system as a proof.
when i arrive Togo western union last week,they discover that all your funds in the Africa development bank western union data base is one million USD dollars only as a compensation to you and the western union in Togo cannot send money to your country United Kingdom at the moment...
immediately yesterday i use my office as the western union managing director to authorize the funds usage permit for you and i contacted Mr.Denis Fing for the presently development going on about your funds...i went to the IMF unit desk in Togo to verify the obstacle and they told me to inform you that your one million USD dollars only has already activated.
So therefore you are hereby advice to send across to me eight receiver names to effect the transfer to you bit by bit until we finish sending the whole funds to you,because every day i will be sending you eight mtcn number bit by bit every day until we finish sending the whole funds to you or we can still use one receivers name depends on your availability to pickup.
This is all for now.... ????
Peacefully.
Mr.Alhaji Ahmed.
Western Union Managing Director West Africa.
Ahmed, very arrogant:Are you sure that things really are that way? I would like to talk with you on the phone, because I do not trust anyone on the Internet. Please call me now, because if I need to make any payment I will only make it after I consider our discussion satisfactory. Robert
Robert is innocent but stubborn and refuses to do anything if he doesn't talk on the phone:I will not call you, If you really want your funds to be transfer to you legally...you suppose to be calling me for help if really you have deposited pending money in my country.
This to officially inform you that we have a new law and our new security recovery Movement Squad(RMS) here in my country currently,if you are having difficulty in clearing consignments/transfer which belongs to you in Ghana.
That is why this committee has been set up by the Government, it is a team of combined forces from the Military ,Police ,SSS to assist you in whatever way we could ,so as for you to carry on with your personal life.
We urge you to stop all email transactions and communications, between you and any scam artist globally as they are into fraudulent activities. More so you are advised to always forward to us all emails in-order for us to have them forwarded to the relevant authorities for proper investigations.
(Your upfront money has nothing to do with my life,i have my own money to leave my life.i'm a big family like you even more than you)????????
i'm not what you think me to be,do i sound like a fraudulent person to you...please i want you to erase every bad feelings you have against me from your mind for your own good and benefit.
More so this officially informs you that I personally put a stop order to every illegal transfer transaction in my country Ghana,because of criminal/ fraudulent activities that have been going on in my country and the entire world today.
we and the Ghana Quick respond team police head quarters/the Ghana inter pole investigated found out your illegal criminal act with so many fake officials trying to defraud huge amount of money from my country to your country united kingdom, of which you do not have any solid and concrete business transaction commence of business here in my country.
please this is my last warning to you to stop every criminal activities with fake people here in my country order wise i will allege you to the international body for fraudulent act.
The Bureau of National Investigations(BNI) is the internal intelligence agency of Ghana. The BNI is an integral part of the National Security Council which oversees matters of the counterintelligence and internal security of Ghana.
Established: 1996 affiliations: Ministry of National Security Ghana
if you know you are really a legal business man in my country then proof yourself to me with concrete evidence of business transaction commence of business.
this is all i have for you for now
have a nice day.
Mr.Ahmed
Ahmed:My dear, the elementary politeness rules in business say that you have to call me and explain all this complicated business to me. For God's sake, I'm 92 years old and I understand only half of the terms that you use in your previous message. On the other hand, we only have a landline phone and we cannot initiate international calls. I should go to the Post Office for this, and outside here it is terribly hot and it is raining heavily. I would prefer to stay at the shelter of my house. Thanks. Robert
Robert:Mr.Robert,Please tell me what do you mean by elementary politeness rules in business?
I admit that I have been in the workforce for a long time, however, it is disheartening to see the deterioration of basic etiquette and professionalism in the workplace.
Some say it is just “this generation”. I am not convinced – because I see it in all demographics.
I believe it is a symptom of a culture that is modeled from the top down.
This may sound elementary but I’m amazed at how some people don’t think twice about walking through a closed door without knocking first.
I am always amazed when I see someone in a conversation, their phone rings and they simply allow the call to go to voicemail.
Please my words is my bond..If you like you believe and trust my details, if you don’t like my details you can also quit your self away, but I don’t want you to be a failure, I’m honest and sincere person… trust no one..Good luck to you once more...Mr.Ahmed?
Ahmed, desperately trying again to re-enter his script:Son, you came out of nowhere with a fanciful and unbelievable proposal. Forgive me, but I am almost 93 years old and I am not aware of the latest technical discoveries and I do not even understand many of the words that young people use today. That's why I asked you to call me to talk like 2 mature men and to make me understand what I have to do and what you expect from me. Robert
Of course, my old Robert is not so easy to fool:Since your Fund has been Re-allocated to a Credit Deposit Facilitated Account in a Bank In Republic of Ghana Standard Chartered Bank security vault WAMA - CREDIT ALLOCATION to payout your outstanding Investment payment to you.
At this point in Time I have done all my home work and I must confirm to you that I have set all legal logistics in place to
make sure you are been paid.
I was ordered by the office of the presidency to inform you and send back all your lost upfront money/your funds back to you immediately urgent without any delay obstacles interference as a compensation to you immediately.
more so i will advice you to calculate all your lost upfront money to me immediately and all scan copy of receivers names you are sending money to here in west Africa,so that i place it in the bank data base system as a proof.
when i arrive Togo western union last week,they discover that all your funds in the Africa development bank western union data base is one million USD dollars only as a compensation to you and the western union in Togo cannot send money to your country RUSSIAN at the moment...
immediately yesterday i use my office as the western union managing director to authorize the funds usage permit for you and i contacted Mr.Denis Fing for the presently development going on about your funds...i went to the IMF unit desk in Togo to verify the obstacle and they told me to inform you that your one million USD dollars only has already activated.
So therefore you are hereby advice to send across to me eight receiver names to effect the transfer to you bit by bit until we finish sending the whole funds to you,because every day i will be sending you eight mtcn number bit by bit every day until we finish sending the whole funds to you or we can still use one receivers name depends on your avaliability to pickup.
I will never call you again.
This is all for now.... ????
Peacefully.
Mr.Alhaji Ahmed.
Western Union Managing Director West Africa.
Here, the idiot was convinced he should call Lenny ... later, he's pretty nervous:Ghana Chartered Bank... Togo Western Union office... Wama Credit Allocation bureau... really? It's a complete mess here. Well, look, sincerely I will certainly not pay a single pound before we have a real phone conversation with you. It seems normal to me to discuss with you and I need to hear your voice and convince myself that this story is not a joke of some children on the Internet. Robert
I notice that you are english professor and i don't care about your educational background...well as a matter of fact i don't like the way you speak with me on telephone conversation....you talking to me like i'm a child.....am not satisfy with your discussion with me on phone....because i do not know whom am talking to on phone...who is Mr.Robert or brother to Robert,i'm total confuse....please don't get it twisted with me...If you like you believe and trust my details, if you don’t like my details you can also quit your self away, but I don’t want you to be a failure, I’m honest and sincere person… trust no one..Good luck to you once more....i will not call you rather you call me period...Mr.Ahmed?.
===
Stage #2: The DollaChop operations
I continued to annoy him for a week, but at one point I felt that Alhaji's patience was coming to an end, I invented a new character (a fake barrister Obi Ofalase) who sent the following message to Robert.
Robert writes to Ahmed and to my fake scammer Obi:This is Barrister Obi Ofalase. I'm working with Director Alhaji Ahmed on your funds.
Director Ahmed asked me to inform you that you have to make a Bank Transfer.
I have included account details for it. Please acknowledge my email and provide me your phone number for better communications.
BANK NAME: GUARANTY TRUST BANK PLC.
BENEFICIARY NAME:***** *****
AMOUNT: 25,000 USD
ACCOUNT NO#:024459****
SWLFT CODE:GTBINGLA
BANK ADDRESS:AKIN ADESOLA STREET VICTORIA ISLAND LAGOS
BENEFICIARY ADDRESS:*********** APAPA LAGOS.
Barrister OBI OFALASE
Western Onion Central Headquarter
Lagos / Nigeria
- Of course Robert paid the money... my fake scammer began to mock Alhaji.Dear Barrister Obi Ofalase. I acknowledge your email. I have a meeting with one of my old army comrades and immediately after our lunch I will go to the bank and pay the commission. I already gave my phone number to Director Alhaji. Please ask him to give you my phone number as you work together. Kind Regards, Robert
- There was also a second succesful Dolla-chop operation, so my idiot finally accepted that my fake scammer is smarter than him.awe broda. how are you .
i hak mugu email.
i go chop chop you moni .
My fake lad to Ahmed:
Ahmed to Obi:awe sakawa . i chop chop you dolla .
i thank you for you cooparation .
- My fake scammer decided to give Alhaji a chance to earn some "easy to take" moneyI don't really have a problem with you.
Everybody dey hustling to survive ...
life not do or die affairs
and I will never cast you for a client or anybody.
it does not matter we don't know each other before as long the street life is concerned we can package together abi warri man living in Ghana for many years.
i strongly believe if we package this client together we go take mega taking from this old man
let forget about sentiment and reason together as matured men.
thanks?
Ahmed to Obi:let leave everytheeng behind an try to see what wi get togedar ok ??
old robert iz a christian man an a membar of his churche
in dat churchs dere ar onley rich old fools who ar easy to cheeat ok
am tried to " get in " dere but am could no convince dem am a real christian an dat i deservd to cooparate with dem
if yu ar really christian an if yu know a littel about deir faith den i hav some ideass dat can bring us lot of monies
... this is how the third stage begins: The Church.alright deal..when are u goin to send me my percentage for the first transaction payment,cos body dey hot like dis my broda?
also i dey design documents for people here in Accra Ghana that is one of my major businesses.
so anything about documents is my field.
also i dey run photo editing and photoshop cut and nail for client....
we no dey betray for here as long the street business is concern na one love.
we dey connect each other for here dey package together
am not a greedy person.
am an Evangelist in my church over here in Accra Ghana.,
i can play that role perfectly
our church name is pure fire miracle ministry.
my General overseer name is Pastor Enoch Aminu
i have a legitimate registration church document over here in Ghana personally
We will continue.